Wild Horses
by MyPolo
Summary: Stef Foster and her 15 year old daughter, Callie, live on the Wood River Ridge Ranch which Stef inherited after her father's death. Lena Adams, a city girl, is on her way to Seattle for a job interview and to relocate after being fired unfairly from her job after her ex girl-friend tried to ruin her reputation. While on her way to Seattle, Lena breaks down near Stef's ranch
1. Chapter 1

*STEF*

For as long as I can remember, I've lived out here in Buccomb Valley, Wyoming, and ever since my father died, I've taken over Wood River Ridge Ranch. Our 250 acres is small compared to the ranches around us, yet it's home and has been home for my family now going on 4 generations. We are known for not only rescuing horses but also as a safe haven to help horses who have fears, hang-ups or need to recover after an injury or illness.

On this particular day, Callie, my 15 year daughter and I are on our way to Jones' Creek stables to look at a mare who is spooked every time it storms. "Do you really think we'll be able to actually help Bella, Mom? I mean, Mr. Jones said she's been this way ever since lightning struck the stable last fall, and they didn't even try to get her help until now!"

I look over at my daughter and smile. She has inherited my dad's talent for reading animals, and I couldn't be prouder. "I'm not sure, but you do know that we always try..."

She seems frustrated as I pull our truck out onto Rt. 77. "When he called this morning, he acted as if we couldn't help her, he was going to have to put her down which I find to be highly unfair seeing as it's not her fault! He should've called us last fall when it happened!"

I reach over and place my hand on her knee, "I know sweetheart, and we will do everything in our power to see we can help her." I reach over and turn the radio on as she rolls down our windows. When did my girl get to be so big and mature? It seems just like yesterday I gave birth to her and brought her home to our little house on the edge of my parents ranch. Even though Russ and I weren't married, he still seemed to want to be her father, but when he got wind of making it big in good old California, he up and took off on us. I'll never forget how heart broken I was, and at the time, Callie was only 3. She cried every night for her daddy for almost 4 months after that, and I vowed I'd never allow any one to hurt my baby like that again.

As we round the corner to get onto Hickory Run, I slow down as I see a car on the side of the road with it's hood up. Almost coming to a complete stop as I near it, I don't recognize it from being from around here. I decide to see if I can help whoever it is; so, I pull off behind the white ritzy looking mustang and turn to Callie. "Stay here. I'll just be a second. Maybe I can help this person."

As I adjust my cowboy hat, I round the car only to come face to face with the most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes on. Her wild curls rustle in the breeze, and I'm shocked to see her in overalls and a tank as well as cowboy boots. I can feel my heart racing out of control as I wipe my hands on my own worn jeans. "What's a gal like you doing driving such a fancy car way out here in the sticks?" I greet this gorgeous creature.

Her big brown eyes meet mine, and except for the black smudge across her cheek, she's flawless. "Are you going to just stand there and stare or are you going to help me?" she asks in an annoyed tone.

I can feel the heat rising up my neck as I pull out my work gloves from my back pocket. "Well since you asked so kindly, let me have a look!" I snap back, and she steps back, annoyed as hell yet looking as sexy as ever. It takes everything in me to not stare as I lean over the heated engine to see what the problem is.

I soon stand up and shut the hood as I take off my gloves. "Looks like you won't be going anywhere for a while. Let me call you a tow truck." I pull out my flip phone, and she looks at me horrified.

"But I need to get to Seattle in 2 days! I have a job interview!" She digs through her purse, and I try to keep from laughing at her.

"Ummmm, excuse me? Wouldn't you just fly instead of make the trip by car and a fancy one at that?" I say with a smirk on my face.

She scowls at me just as she finds her fancy phone. "I'll have you to know, I'm moving there as well! I had my stuff shipped ahead, and I decided to make the drive so I could see the pretty countryside! Not that you would understand!" She huffs as she stomps away making her phone call.

"Mom? What's going on? Who is that woman? And what's she doing out here?" Callie is now beside me, and I shake my head laughing softly.

"I have no idea who she is, but she is a wild one!" I keep laughing as we both start to head back for our truck.

"Excuse me! Excuse me, Miss!" the curl haired woman calls after us, and I turn around. "Do you mind showing me the nearest hotel? I have a tow truck coming, but I'd rather wait somewhere I can freshen up and make a few calls and check my email."

Callie snorts, and I elbow her as I reply, "Oh, honey, you're better off just staying with me. I have a guest house out back by the barn, and I won't charge you. What did you say your name was again?" I ask this as my heart races. This woman is trying too hard to look country, but I can tell she has no clue about any of this stuff.

She shuts her purse as she heads to grab a bag out of her car. "I never did tell you my name...but since I'll be staying with you, I guess I can." Her eyes are dark now as she seems to stare a hole right through me.

I swallow hard as if I've just been reprimanded, "Well, I'm Stef, and this is my daughter, Callie. We live up on the Wood River Ridge Ranch just as you enter Buccomb Valley. I'm sure you passed it." I smile nervously now as I reach for her bag, but she holds on to it for dear life.

"I'm Lena. Lena Adams, and I'm from Chicago, Illinois. Like I said, I'm moving to Seattle, Washington." She looks at me now as if to say what next, and I snap out of it as I lead the way back to my truck. Waiting for this tow truck feels like the longest hour of my life.


	2. Chapter 2

*LENA*

"How is this even possible?" I stand as I raise my voice to my CEO of the Holden Publishing Company where I've worked for almost 8 years.

The slinky man won't even look me straight in the eye as I'm now shaking with anger. I fight back the burning tears that are threatening to spill down my cheeks. I won't allow this man or anyone else see just how badly this is killing me inside. Not only have I worked here for going on 8 years, but also, I have managed to work my way up to a senior editor. When I broke up with Gretchen last week, she had said she would make it her mission to drive me out of a job as well as out of town. She apparently had kept her word as here I was in Don Bartlett's office being let go.

My face is red as my fists are balled up at my side, and when Don pushes the paper and pen my way for me to sign, we stare each other down for an uncomfortable amount of time. Finally swallowing the huge lump in my throat, I dejectedly snatch up the pen and sign my name.

Don clears his throat as he stands and holds out his hand, "It's been nice working with you, Lena, and I promise I won't give you a bad recommendation if anyone calls."

I just stare him down and don't return the kind gesture as I pick up my briefcase, and turn for the door. Right before I exit, I turn to him and spit out, "Save your recommendations, Don. I didn't need it when I started here, and sure as hell won't need it now. Oh, and Don?"

His face is beat red now as he just stands there watching me. "Have fun being Gretchen's bitch!" With that, I walk out of the office to gather my things. By the time I finish packing what I want to bring with me, I'm exhausted and depressed. How the hell am I going to be able to start all over again here in Chicago? Dating Gretchen, the owner of this company, was probably the absolute worst decision I could have ever made, and now, as I catch a cab to my hotel room, I realize she kept her word: driving me from my job and now the city.

*STEF*

"And if you're hungry, come on up to the main house. We have plenty of food, but I don't make it a habit of stocking this fridge unless I'm expecting company," I say all of this to Lena as I show her into our guest house as promised.

She just nods and places her bag on the neatly made bed. "So, you have Wifi?"

It takes everything in me not to laugh at this woman. It's not so much that I find her to be funny, but that she's so serious and so uptight, I'm unsure if she knows how to relax and just be. "No, but if you come up to the house, you can use mine."

I hear her sigh as she sits on the chair and takes off her cowboy boots which look brand new. I fight the urge to ask her which tourist facility she purchased them, and just nod as I head for the door. "I think I'm just going to rest. I may be up later."

"Feel free to come up anytime. I promise I don't bite!" I flirt lightly as I open the door. As I close the door, I swear I hear her mutter, "But I do...flirt!"

I laugh as I head to the house. This woman is going to be the death of me for sure.

Since we were interrupted earlier when going to see Belle, Callie and I head up to Jones' Stables to make an assessment after I got Lena settled. After deciding that Callie can help her better at our ranch, we load her in the horse trailer we brought with us and head back before dark so we can get her settled in her stall.

"Hey, Mom, I'll get Belle settled and muck the stalls before dinner. Don't worry about helping. I know you have your hands full with getting dinner for our snooty guest," Callie rolls her eyes for emphasis as she leads Belle to the barn.

"Callie, baby, I know she's not from around here, but we shouldn't make assumptions about someone especially when we don't know their story," I admonish her as I close the trailer door.

"I heard the way she spoke to you! People don't treat people like that in these parts," Callie has always stuck up for me, even to the point of running Burl Preston off the property not long after my dad died when he came to make an offer to buy the ranch. I was out in the barn only to hear a shot gun go off, and Burl running for his truck. Needless to say, I didn't want another incident on my hands at Lena's expense.

"Callie," I place my arm around her shoulders. "I know you're protective of me, and I appreciate that. Just, give the woman a chance, ok? She's from the city, and I can tell she's not used to NOT getting her way. Let's just be nice, yes?"

She nods and leans in to kiss my cheek just as we both hear a throats being cleared behind us. My heart stops briefly as I slowly turn around and am face to face with none other than Lena Adams, arms crossed, stern look on her face, which rattles me to my core.

"Oh, hello! Did you want to come up to the house with me?" I try to play off the fact that I was just talking about her and hoping as well that she didn't hear too much, especially Callie's words.

"No, actually, I was coming to find you to ask if I can stay a few more days. Supposedly the part for my mustang has to be ordered, and I'm stuck in this place until it comes in!" Her voice is raising the more she talks, and I can tell she's not only exhausted but stressed.

"Walk with me," I walk over to her and run my hand down her arm, instantly sending jolts of electricity through me.

She nods as we walk to the house. "What about your interview in 2 days?"

She stops and brushes her soft curly hair from her face as she sighs letting down for a second, her walls. I can see her chin fighting not to quiver, "I tried to call them; so, I won't know until the morning if I can reschedule..."

I ache for this woman for some reason, and all I want to do is pull her in my arms and tell her everything is going to be ok. But how can I really assure that to her? And why do I even want to do that for someone I just met? Instead, I give her a reassuring smile as I pull out the chicken for dinner. "You can stay as long as you need to stay. No reason going to town to pay for a hotel room."

She nods as she rubs her arms and looks out my window. Lena Adams is going to be one hell of a nut to crack for sure. I've never met anyone quite like her.


	3. Chapter 3

*LENA*

As I sit in the guest house having barely touched my food, I decide to try and read for a bit. Lately, I've been very depressed, and the thought of actually moving to another city and starting over gets heavier and heavier every day. Not only did I lose my job, I lost my girlfriend, and I lost my life as I knew it. Why I ever agreed to date Gretchen, I'll never know. I knew she was a player long before I went out with her, and for some unknown reason, I thought she'd be different than me.

*FLASHBACK*

Finishing up my almost 12 hour workday, I decided to call it quits and go home, take a nice hot bath and have a giant glass of cab. My project's timeline keeps getting pushed further and further back which pushes me to put in these long hours, and not only that, the stress of not seeing Gretchen for the last 10 days is almost too much on us. When she's here, she's present and loving, but when she's gone, she's distant and doesn't really want to talk on the phone, FaceTime or text much. It's really been wearing on me as of late, and the nagging feeling that something is off won't leave my mind.

As I park in our private parking garage below our penthouse, I notice Gretchen's car in her spot. My heart races as I quickly get on the elevator. She wasn't supposed to be home until Monday; so, Im excited to see her a few days early.

Exiting the elevator and opening the door was the last thing I should have done, but it never ever occurred to me that Gretchen would betray me in such a manner and in our apartment at that. Placing my keys on the kitchen table, I hear moans coming from my bedroom. The rush of fear filled with anxiety and the realization that something bad is going on fills me as I take off my heels and walk quietly to my room.

As I open the door, I shouldn't be shocked, but I am, to see Gretchen between none other than my assistant, Kara's, legs. I cover my mouth to stifle a scream as I fall into the door making both women jump up in a panic.

"Oh, Lena!" Gretchen reaches for her robe. "It's not what you think!"

"The fuck! It's not what I think!" I say shrilly my voice sounded like it was in a tunnel as my head began to reel.

"I'm sorry...Lena!" Kara is crying now as she quickly tries to get dressed.

I feel my own tears falling down my face now as I begin to shake from the fury of it all. I knew Gretchen was like this. I knew! Yet, I chose to date and fall in love with her anyway. She just can't seem to help herself. No other words come out of my mouth or to my mind except: I'm the dumb one.

Kara leaves in a hurry, and I've slunk to the floor crying while Gretchen tries to explain. But I hear nothing. I see nothing. I feel nothing. The next thing I know, I've woken up with a note next to me apologizing again and saying she'll be out of town until Wednesday now.

*FLASHBACK ENDS*

I can't help but to have noticed how beautiful Stef is, but I can't allow myself to go there...not even close. Not only that, she's most likely into men since she has a daughter. Anyways, hopefully I can reschedule my interview and be gone from this place by the weekend. Somehow, I really need to move on with my life. I have to pick up the shattered pieces and somehow learn how to rebuild my life again, and what better way to do it but in a place where no one knows me.

*STEF*

"I can take you into town! It won't put me out! Keep your money!" I tell Lena the next day when she came to me to ask if she could call a cab out here to pick her up since she needed a few things from the store.

"Don't you have to round up some horses or lasso some cows or something?" she asks me innocently to which Callie slams down her cup.

"Really? Do we look like cowboys to you?" Callie mouths off.

"Cals..." I look at her sternly.

Lena looks over at Callie, shocked, and Callie mutters, "I'm sorry..." before getting up to clear her oatmeal bowl. Looking at me, she says despondently, "I'm going to work with Belle, ok, Mom? Let me know if you go into town."

I nod as I stand to re-fill my coffee cup, "More coffee, Lena?"

She shakes her head as she plays with her eggs. I watch her as I stir the cream in my cup. She looks so lost, nothing like yesterday when she was snappy and curt. I wonder what her story is. Sitting across from her, I sip my hot coffee, "So, let me know if and when you want to go, ok?"

She finally looks up and replies softly, "I may be here a while longer. Fred, the mechanic guy in town called me this morning and said the part won't be in until next week." She fidgets with her cup handle as she tells me this.

I try not to look happy as I nod, "It's ok with me. I could even show you around and give you a few riding lessons." My eyes twinkle at the last offer only to have her shoot me down.

"I don't need lessons. I know how to ride..."

"You do?" I'm trying too hard not to sound shocked but fail.

"I know I look like I can't handle a horse, but I didn't grow up in Chicago, you know. In fact, I grew up in the outskirts in a little town, and I used to show jump."

Raising my eyebrows in complete surprise I repeat what she just said to me, "You show jumped horses? Competitions and ribbons?"

She laughs softly, "Yes, Stef, and even though that was years ago, I'm sure I can still handle a horse." Her eyes have softened some as they meet mine.

There goes my need to reach out and run my fingers softly down her face, but of course, I'd never embarrass myself like that. So instead I stand and clear my throat, "So, we going to town or not, woman?"

I hear her soft sigh as she too stands, "Ya, give me a moment. I'll meet you at your truck in 15 minutes." She sets the time she wants to leave before heading down to the guest house making my heart race a thousand beats per minute.


	4. Chapter 4

LENA*

FLASHBACK*

 _Wednesday came and with it Gretchen. For some reason, I thought she'd know better than to actually come back to our penthouse and actually find me forgiving, for I was quite the opposite. In the beginning, she knew where I stood when it came to cheating and having multiple women on the side, and she had sworn to me I was different. That she had her eye on me from the beginning and knew she could and would stay faithful to me. Even though I had told her all of my qualms of starting said relationship with her, she was a smooth talker and soon I was moving in with her and everyone knew us as this power couple._

 _I easily moved up to be what I always dreamed, a senior editor on staff, and she knew how to make me feel loved and appreciated. All of that lasted only a year, and then her traveling became heavier, and with it came the fights as when she travelled, she would barely answer my texts or phone calls and would skip over the facetimes I tried to send._

 _"Yoo-hoo! I'm home, Lena!" I could hear Gretchen's voice as she exited the elevator turning my heart to ice. I was in our room, finishing up the packing of my belongings where she found me. "What are you doing? Really? We never got to talk, Lena!" She said as she set down her expensive Coach purse._

 _"Talk about what? There's nothing to talk about.." I say curtly as I tape up my last box then head to empty my toiletries from the bathroom where she followed me._

 _"I thought you loved me, Lena..." she says in a sad tone which does nothing to me at the moment. I simply ignore her as I dig for my things. "Lena? Is this how it's going to be?" She continues to push._

 _I turn quickly towards her, my face red, "Yes, Gretchen! This is how it's going to be! I just want to know how long?" My voice is raised now causing her eyebrows to raise for even when we fought, I rarely raised my voice._

 _"How long? What do you mean?" She pretends innocence which is beyond my comprehension._

 _"I guess the question should be how long and how many? You think I'm stupid? You think I don't know when you travel you hook up? You just can't help yourself, can you? How long did it take you to seduce Kara, of all people, Gretchen?" My fists are balled as I spew how I feel._

 _This doesn't seem to deter her in the least as she walks towards me just about backing me against the wall by the shower, "It's not what you think. Please, Lena! You mean everything to me! I wish you knew that! I meant what I said: you're different to me!"_

 _I scoff now as I slam down my hairbrush, "I meant everything to you! I did? Are you kidding yourself, Gretchen? Really? I don't have any words for you right now..." I push my way past her as I start shoving everything into my overnight bag._

 _But she doesn't know when to stop. "It's true! I've tried so hard to make this work, Lena! I...I messed up, ok? But I can try to make it up to you! Tell me what to do!"_

 _I sniffle now as I try to hold back the tears of anger and hurt, "Nothing...you can't ever make it up to me..." I march back into the bedroom and shove some clothes in an overnight bag. "I'll have my things out of here by the end of the week, but I'm staying in a hotel. We were over the minute you decided to go down on my best friend..." I choke out the last words as I grab my keys._

 _"Wait!!!! Lena! Please!" Gretchen all but rushes towards me and grabs my arm. "Don't go! I'm sorry! Please! Lena!"_

 _I try to yank away, but she keeps a firm grip on my wrist making me wince. "Let go of me, Gretchen," I whimper out as she gets in my face._

 _"You'll regret this. I'll ruin you! You'll never get an editing job here in Chicago, I guarantee you that!" She hisses in my face now turning my blood cold as my heart hammers, but I remain firm._

 _"I said get off of me! You won't threaten me, Gretchen! Done! That's what we are!" I manage to get out of her grasp as I hurry to leave. As the elevator closes, I hear her yelling._

 _"You can't just leave me, Lena!!!! I'll make your life a living hell!!!!"_

FLASHBACK ENDS*

I wake up in a panic as I sit up straight in the bed, my heart hammering out of control. My face feels wet, and I realize I've been dreaming again. I've had this same nightmare almost every night after it happened and each time I wake up crying.

Wiping my eyes, I realize it's only 2 in the morning, and I'm thirsty; so, I head to the main house to get a drink of water. As I tiptoe to the cupboard for a glass, I hear a soft voice behind me. "Can't sleep either?"

I jump as I turn to see Stef standing there in a pair of shorts and a tank. My face feels hot as I look over her tone body and back up to her soft hazel eyes. "Oh...no..bad dream..." I admit as I fill my glass with cold water.

"Ya?" Her bare feet pad over to grab herself some water. "Wanna talk about it?"

I bite my bottom lip as I shake my head and lean against the sink. "I'm just stressed about this job interview is all...not used to sleeping in such quiet." I now laugh nervously as I play with my glass.

Leaning against the fridge, she listens to me intently before replying, "Ya, I bet the city is much noisier than out here in the country. All you hear out here are coyotes, barn owls and crickets!" She smiles at me softly.

I quickly blink back hot tears not wanting to cry in front of her. The way she looks at me is making me emotional for some reason. It's like she really cares, and to be honest, I haven't felt heard or cared for in quite some time. All I can chalk this up to is that I'm purely exhausted at this point; so, I gulp down my water and head for the door.

"You don't have to run off! Stay!" she calls after me, and I turn. "On the couch...I can make you some tea...we can talk..."

It all sounds inviting, but I can't. I can't get close to her or anyone especially since I'll be heading to Seattle soon enough. I smile sadly, "I really am tired. I'm going to head back..." I open the love door and leave before she can stop me. No sense in drinking and baring my heart to a strange woman I'm attracted to. No sense in hurting more than I already do.


	5. Chapter 5

STEF*

The more time I spend watching Lena and how she carries herself as well as takes control of any given situation, the more my heart begins to fall. I can't seem to keep it from falling either, but what has been bothering me is the mere fact that I've never been with a woman. Yes, I've had school girl crushes, yet I've never even tried to make a go of things. Even though my childhood best friend, Mazie, and I kissed one day after a trail ride, nothing ever came of it because my brother caught us and threatened to expose the truth. I feared my reputation more than anything and even went as far as having a boyfriend, Russ, with whom I fooled around. Thus, I have Callie.

Today I really want to take Lena on a trail ride and see what she really does know about horses. She seems too city-fied in my opinion, and I'm struggling to even think of her up on a horse unless I'm in front of her, and she's holding on to me for dear life. The thought of that makes me smile as I cut up strawberries for the picnic lunch I'm preparing for the trail.

"What's so funny?" Callie asks as she grabs a mug for her coffee.

I look up from being deep in thought as I blush slightly, "And what do you think you're doing?" I scold, ignoring her question by asking one of my own.

"Aww, c'mon! One cup of coffee won't hurt me!" She wails comically which only makes me dig in deeper.

"It most certainly will! You're only 15 and don't need to start bad habits! Now scat!" I wave my knife and she jumps back dramatically, falling into a caught off guard, Lena.

"Ohhhh!" Lena squeals as Callie jumps back.

"Watch it! I thought you'd be more alert seeing as you're from the city!" Callie says sarcastically as she adjusts her hoodie.

"Callie!" I turn and reprimand her as I frown deeply, giving her a hard look.

"What? It's the truth! Isn't your car almost done?" Callie continues to be rude to our guest and I slam down the knife in my hand.

"Don't you have a horse to work with?" I ask exasperated and embarrassed as Lena is frowning, pouring her own cup of coffee.

Callie mumbles something inaudibly as she rushes out of the room, and I rub my forehead, "I'm sorry she's been so rude to you. This isn't really her..." I trail off as Lena blows on her hot coffee looking out the big picture window. She doesn't respond, and I continue, "Anyway, I didn't know if you had plans today or anything, but I was going to try to ride out and check the fences on the property...if you wanted to join me..." I lick my lips as I wait for some kind of life in her.

She turns to me slowly and shrugs, "My car should be ready tomorrow; so, why not?"

This makes me smile, yet the mention of her leaving tomorrow makes my stomach turn. I lean against the counter. "So, you'll be...ummm, leaving us tomorrow then?" I ask this softly hoping I'm wrong.

"I probably should...although, I lost my spot for that interview; so, I can now take my time over to Seattle..." she looks really sad and I want to pry some more Burt decide to leave it alone for now.

Nodding I turn back to the strawberries, "I should be done packing our lunch here in about ten minutes. I'd dress in layers if I were you in case you get too hot or it decides to rain when we're out there." My heart is hammering with excitement but I don't want to give that away as I hurry to make the sandwiches and pack thermoses of coffee and water. When I turn to say something else, I notice she's gone. I sigh hoping she has more to say on this ride than what she's been saying this past week.

LENA*

"You are too much, Stefanie!" I jump off my horse as we stop along the trail for our lunch. It's midday and the sun, blazing down on us, is making us thirsty, and we know the horses have to be as well. Leading Daffin, the horse I've been riding, down to the small stream, I look over at Stef laughing hysterically as she has brought her own horse to the stream as well.

She looks over at me with this glimmer of humor in her eyes, "Why do you say that? I would think that after years of sitting in an office, your ass couldn't handle hours on a saddle!"

I'm laughing with her as I take my own hat off and sit under the shade, untying the kerchief that was around my neck and wiping the sweat off my brow. "I do go home to visit sometimes and ride. I'm not completely what was it Callie called me? City-fied?"

Stef grabs the picnic lunch out of her saddle and throws me my thermos from my own. "Ahhhh, don't mind Callie. She's always been protective but even more so after her grandfather died.." She takes out the sandwiches and hands me one before taking a huge bite out of hers.

I daintily unwrap my turkey and lettuce sandwich before I begin eating as well. It's really hot now, and I wonder how in the world Stef can stand working out in this day in and day out. I have gotten spoiled by air conditioning and swimming pools, and hot tubs especially when I was with Gretchen...I feel my face grow hot as Gretchen's name comes to my mind and I find myself wrapping up my sandwich as I lose my appetite.

Stef looks over at me as she takes a long drink from her thermos. "Not too hungry?"

I shake my head. "The heat has probably gotten to me..."

She nods and finishes her last bite before standing and holding out her hand to me. "C'mon! We can cool off!"

I frown as she half drags me down to the stream and begins stripping down. I look at her, my mouth wide open as well as my eyes. "It's broad daylight! What are you thinking?" I gasp as she laughs.

"Oh, geez! We're out in the middle of nowhere and this is still my land! Keep your underclothes on if you want! You'll have plenty of time to dry off!" She lifts off her tank, and I still stand here, mute and shocked as I watch her toned body walk to the edge of the stream then head down over to this flat rock.

I stare at her, and my eyes roam from her black bra to her black boy shorts as she leans over and runs her hand thru the water before stepping down into its coolness. "Get your prissy ass over here, woman!" she calls out to me, breaking me out of my trance, and I giggle as I begin to strip but fold my clothes neatly setting them under the tree unlike hers which are scattered everywhere.

I follow her suit, stepping out onto the flat rock and watching her float lazily on her back as she watches me. I laugh as I step in the water and scream as it's frostiness stings my hot legs.

She sits up amused, "Are you ok?" Her voice is filled with giddiness and I can't tell if she is mocking me or concerned.

I just laugh it off as I sink lower into the depths and allow the water to envelope me in its embrace. She swims over to me, and as she nears me, she reaches over and grabs my hand. "You do know how to swim, yes?"

"Of course! I'm just not used to doing it in...without a suit!"

Our eyes meet, and hers are filled with mirth and something else. I had left my tank on but it's now soaked through and I may as well have taken it off. I lay back suddenly as I get my hair wet and then resurface, face to face with Stef.

She gasps slightly as if I have caught her off guard, and next thing I know, she is nearing my face. I swallow hard and giggle out, "Oh shit! Where are the horses?"


	6. Chapter 6

LENA*

"I'll be heading out first thing in the morning," I say this as Callie silently passes me the green beans at dinner. Ever since we got home about 2 hours ago, she's done nothing but eye me with suspicion even peering over the stall door to see that I was caring for Daffin correctly. I am beginning to think she either feels threatened by my presence or she is just being a typical teenage girl being over-protective of her mom. I can't say I really blame her considering her mom is her family and since losing her grandfather, whom I assume she was really close to, it's just them two on this ranch. Any stranger would make her feel suspicious.

Stef nods as she cuts into her meatloaf, "Ok, I can give you a ride into town to pick up your car. What time do you want to leave?"

I take a sip of my water before responding, "The earlier the better. I believe Mitch said his service center opens at 8."

We continue to make small talk as we eat, and Stef even recounts to Callie how I thought the horses took off on us earlier. She rolls her eyes as she grabs another roll. "Everyone knows they'll head to shade when it's hot...Dusty wouldn't have run off without Mom anyway..."

I blush slightly as I giggle nervously, "Guess I'm not used to the country like I used to be!" Brushing the crumbs off my face, I set my fork down, suddenly not very hungry. Maybe it is good I'm leaving tomorrow. The sooner I'm out of their hair, the better off they'll be.

"Callie..." Stef chides her again as she gives her a look.

She only sighs, "Sorry...I did make strawberry shortcake for dessert...want a piece, Lena?"

The truth is, I've started to really like Stef, and the truth is, it seems Callie will always hate me, and with that knowledge, my stomach is twisting, but I notice her olive branch; so, I smile and nod, "Sure, I'll try a piece..."

She nods abruptly as she heads to grab the dessert. Stef clears her throat before she looks at me and says quietly, "She would eventually warm up to you..."

My heart is hammering as she says this, and I don't know how to take it. Does she like me too? Today on the trail, it felt right. It felt like we had been doing this for years, and I don't think it's my imagination that she almost kissed me in the stream earlier. I smile faintly, "Yes, but I do need to head out. I don't have all the time in the world to wait for that." I realize what I said at the end right after I say it, and I see the look of confusion flash across Stef's face right as Callie re enters the room.

"Is this ok?" Callie asks sweetly as she holds out a plate with the strawberry dessert on it. I nod and smile at her as I take it.

"Mmmm, you bake often, Callie?" I ask as I take my first bite.

She shyly nods, "Kind of...I mean I've been baking since I was what, 3?" She looks at her mom who nods.

Dinner soon ends and with it clean up, and Callie muttering she wants to check on Belle. I begin to head for the back door so I can go and pack my things and go to bed early when Stef comes up behind me. I feel her presence before I hear her and turn around, almost nose to nose with her which makes me catch my breath.

"Stay and have a glass of wine on the back porch swing," she smiles at me as our eyes lock. There's that look again, and I can literally feel my heart beating out of control as my breathing becomes labored. What is it with this woman that makes me feel like I'm coming undone?

STEF*

Over the past 10 days, I've grown very fond of Lena, and knowing she'll be leaving in the morning makes my heart hurt. The last time I felt something like this for another girl, I was 16. And the girl never left town. I had to see her each and every day with her jock boyfriend while my heart crumpled into a mess. I shake myself out of it as I bring both wine glasses onto the porch for me and Lena. She's sitting quietly on the porch looking out over the ranch, and my heart rate quickens as I stop to watch her for a minute, her soft curly hair blowing in the breeze. Her neatly manicured hands folded neatly in her lap. Her profile makes me melt completely as I wonder what is going through her mind at this moment.

She looks over at me, and I quickly hand her her glass of wine. "Relaxing, huh?" I say softly as I sit on the other end of the swing and swing my feet up in front of me so I'm facing her.

"It is. I really did forget what it was like living in peace and quiet and away from everyone." She seems nostalgic as I listen intently to her.

"Do you wish you never left?" I'm curious about her life, and I want to get to know everything I can about this woman.

She looks at me as she shifts her body as well so she's facing me. "No. No I wanted to move to the big city, but more importantly, I really wanted to write...be an author, yet never did. I ended up being a proofreader and then an editor, then a senior editor...life kind of got away from me, I guess.." she laughs at this as if she regrets some things.

I continue to listen to her, and when she appears done for the moment, I ask, "So, tell me. What makes you want to move to Seattle? I never did ask."

She shrugs softly as she looks dejected all of the sudden. "My friend, Jenna, sent me the link to interview for this publishing company. I mean, I missed the interview, but when I spoke to her this morning, she said they hadn't hired anyone yet for the position. So, I'll be moving near some friends...kind of starting over."

I nod and then quickly give my input, "You said you dreamed of writing, and you also said you were wanting to start over. Why don't you do just that? Maybe I'm overstepping, but it seems like you're going to jump right in where you left off giving you more excuses as to why you haven't written your book yet..." I say all of this then stop as I realize she's staring at me wide eyed.

"Wow...just wow...you really don't hold back, do you?" She laughs awkwardly as she shifts to sit forward, her arms on her knees.

I scoot closer as I try to catch her eye as I talk, "I mean, it's true, right? When were you planning on writing this book?" I watch her for her answer, and her body language says it all: she feels lost. I sigh as I suddenly feel badly and reach over to run my hand down her arm warranting her to look over at me and her soft brown eyes meet mine.

"That's a good question...I...I just don't know where to go to...to write...I mean all of my stuff is in Seattle...I am leaving tomorrow..."

I lick my lips and sit back. "You don't have to..." I finally say softly.

She looks over at me. "What?" she asks in a small voice.

I reach over and brush her hair behind her shoulder, "You don't have to leave tomorrow, I mean...you...feel free to stay and start writing. I mean, you can make the guest house your little apartment or whatever you want to call it..." I begin rambling nervously hoping she'll not think I'm being too forward.

She is biting her lower lip as she listens to me, and it's scaring me. "I don't know...your daughter...I..."

I move in closer to her and place my finger on her lips. "Shhhh..."

But as I do this, big tears come to her eyes and she quickly blinks them back as my heart hurts for her. All I want is to pull her into my arms and comfort her, make her feel loved and secure. She stands to run off, but I catch her arm pulling her closely to me.

"Lena," I whisper as she is sniffling softly in the now darkness that is surrounding us.

"Please...I...can't..." her voice shakes as her chin quivers.

I cup her cheek softly as our eyes meet, and next thing I know, my lips are on hers as I taste the saltiness of her tears. It's brief but seers a jolt of electricity right through me, yet before I can kiss her again, she's pulled away from me and is gone. I slowly sink back onto the swing as I touch my lips, my knees weak. What did I just do?

The next morning, after a restless night's sleep, I get up to make coffee for our trip. I sigh as I look out my kitchen window out to the guest house, but I don't see the lights on which I find to be strange. One thing I've learned about Lena over the past ten days is that she is early for everything, and she gets ready what seems like hours before she needs to be somewhere. I grab my hoodie and slip it on as I hurry to see if possibly she didn't set her alarm.

When I reach her door, I knock softly and when there is no answer, I knock harder, "Lena!!!! Lena, it's Stef!!!" When there's still no answer, I turn the doorknob and open the door cautiously. "Lena?" I say hoarsely as I enter the house, my heart racing. Something feels way off, and as I flip on the light, I gasp. The bed is neatly made and everything is as it is was before she stayed here. I walk in the room, and I look everywhere for a sign of where she went or why she would leave without a note or something. But I find nothing.

My stomach turns in knots as I realize one thing: I scared her off.


	7. Chapter 7

LENA*

Tears stream down my face as the plane starts taxiing down the runway. Stefanie Foster kissed me! She kissed me not even two hours ago, and I panicked. I rushed back to the guesthouse and gathered my things determined to just get out of town while I could, and after calling a taxi, I managed to get to the airport and grab a red eye flight. Yes, my car was still in the garage in town, but at the time I flew into a frenzy to leave town, I didn't seem to care too much. I would figure it out somehow.

I should have left ten days ago and figured it out afterwards. Then I wouldn't be in this predicament: running from someone I was starting to develop feelings for. Someone who paid more attention to me and my needs than my own girlfriend of one and a half years. Someone I knew was sincere. And someone who scared me half to death because she could see right through me. That's who I had to get away from. I couldn't be involved with someone so soon. Not after trusting Gretchen who broke every ounce of trust I had left. I know Stef isn't her. I know that deep down inside of me, and I'm not punishing her for it. I also don't think it's fair I jump into something with her when I'm still hurting badly. She deserves more than that. She's special, and I wish I would've at least told her that.

As it is, she'll probably never forgive me for running. I know the story of Callie's dad and how he left suddenly without so much as a backward glance. I sniffle as I realize I'm no better than him. What was I thinking?

As we land, I notice that it's raining really hard here in Seattle, and I feel my stomach turning from nerves and just everything that has transpired over the past few weeks. Jenna meets me to pick me up, and I hug her tightly as she squeezes me back.

"Do you want to talk about it?" She squeezes my hand as we head to her car.

I wipe my eyes, "I don't know where to begin, but I hardly know Stef, Jenna! But I do know that she's an oasis in a dry desert..."

We head out in the morning traffic towards her house. "Gretchen treated you poorly, sweetie...you got mad at me for saying that, remember?"

I nod as I fidget with my fingers. "I know. And I shouldn't have. You only cared about my happiness..."

The rain is coming down hard, and Jenna has to concentrate on the road. So this leaves me to my thoughts as I look out the window at the dreary day. Suddenly without warning, my phone vibrates and in comes a text message from none other than a one, Stefanie Foster.

I'm very sorry for overstepping your boundaries. You told me you couldn't, and I did anyway. I want you to know that you will always have a place to stay here on Wood River Ridge. Wherever you are, know I really do care.

I read and reread the text as my heart races and fresh tears fall down my face. Why does she care so much? We barely know each other! I've never had anyone care that much for me this quickly or even deeply. It's like a healing salve in the deep wound in my heart. I quickly shut my phone off and place it in my purse. I need to forget her. I can't do this. Moving on is the only key to my survival.

STEF*

"Are you kidding me? She left without saying goodbye or even leaving a note?" Callie asks heatedly when she comes downstairs to see me wiping tears from my eyes.

I fake smile even though my girl knows me better than this. "Maybe she didn't wish to say goodbye. I'm sure she had her reasons, love..." I say this softly as Callie stands in front of me scowling, her arms folded in front of her.

"Then why are you crying, Mom? She hurt you! That's what!" she opens the cabinet to pull down a mug for coffee, and at this point I don't feel like arguing with her as I watch her pour herself some coffee.

"Listen, Callie. Lena isn't this monster you are making her out to be, and quite frankly, you were very rude to her for the majority of the time!" I stand and hold my hand up to stop her from protesting. "I love her, Callie! I know that's hard to believe, but something about her made me fall for her and hard! I won't sit here and listen to you bad mouth her."

I rush over to the sink and quickly wash my mug before Callie sees the tears beginning to fall again.

"But, Mom! You have too big of a heart! How do you know you love her? You JUST met her 10 days ago!"

I turn to look at her, my face now red. "When you know, you just know! I realize you're protective of me, and I would never ever bring someone in your life to hurt you! Do you understand that?"

Callie begins to soften some as she sees my emotions, something I rarely show, all over my face. "Mom..." she runs up to me, wrapping her arms around me burying her face in my neck.

"Oh, Callie, I love you, baby doll..."I squeeze her back as she eventually pulls away.

"Don't let her run from you then. You have to fight for what's yours! Isn't that what grandpa always used to say? 'Fight for what's yours and never give up!'"

I smile softly as I wipe the remaining tears from my eyes. "Yes, baby, but Lena is a grown woman. She will do what she wants ok? I'm not into chasing someone or holding them captive...remember your daddy?" I run my fingers down her baby face.

She looks sad as she nods. "I know I was little, Mom, but I remember how sad you were."

I look at her softly, "I was sad because you cried for him every single night...it broke my heart, sweetheart!"

She sighs as she heads to grab some cereal. "Well, this is different. I'm sad because you're hurting. I still think you should go after her.."

I chuckle softly as I put on my cowboy hat, "No, baby girl. I'm not going after her." I wink at her as I hurry outside towards the barn to start today's training with Marley, my new colt. My heart races as I send her a text. No, I may not be going after her, but I sure as hell won't let her forget me.


	8. Chapter 8

LENA*

"So, the interview went well, I think, and they said they'd let me know by Friday after they close the the interviews," I smile as I sit across from Jenna and Kelly at dinner. We're currently at their favorite hibachi grill catching up with each other, and they're trying to get me to relax after everything I've been through this past year.

"Is the job what you're looking for? I saw it and thought of you. Don't feel badly if it doesn't feel right, Len," Kelly says as she sips her martini.

I shrug as I stir my drink with the skinny straw. "I don't know anymore. You know I've been wanting to take a hiatus and just write for myself. And Stef offered me her guest house and all, but..." I trail off as I sigh raggedly. I look up to meet the eyes of both of my friends.

"What are you afraid of? I mean I get you were terribly hurt, and your confidence is shattered...but do you think you can't co-exist on her ranch? Can you just write and not have to see her? I don't know..." Jenna laughs as she seems to be thinking out loud.

I know both of my friends care, and I hate to let them down. But most of all, I don't really know what direction I should be going! I'm already 32 and am not getting any younger. "She kissed me, ok? She's been wanting to, and she finally did!" My face flushes as I admit this to Kelly. Jenna already knew.

Kelly just nods before asking pointedly, "And did you like it?"

I throw my head back and laugh as she asks me this. "Kelly, she kind of reminds me of you. Straight to the chase, and I always know what she's thinking or most of the time. But her daughter..."

"Wait...you didn't tell me she had a daughter!" Jenna chimes in now as she leans forward.

"Oh, yes, she most certainly does," I laugh awkwardly remembering Callie's disapproving glares.

"That takes it to another level then! Is she straight and experimenting?" Kelly asks as I take a bite of chicken.

"No!" I exclaim in her defense then realize I'm being loud as I lower my voice some. "No, she's not...I mean she was with Callie's father and got pregnant but never married. I mean, she's...well, I just know she's not straight..." I blush now as both of my friends are staring me down. I giggle awkwardly as I continue after a moment of silence. "Guys, she's not experimenting...I...I just know. She's sweet and genuine and funny. She's so disorganized and always late but she makes a joke out of everything. She's so sensitive and intense...I mean, this woman is beautiful..."

Kelly snickers as I stop rambling, "You're blushing, Lena Adams! You like her! You need to go back as soon as possible!"

"I can't! Oh my god! The way I left is completely unforgivable! You don't understand!" I say mortified at the thought. "Not only that, her daughter, Callie, doesn't like me very much, and I can't come between a mother and her daughter. I won't do it!"

"The sooner the better. I have to agree with Kelly, Lena. You can't pass this opportunity up! And not only that, you can do some online editing on the side for income, right? Until your book is written?" Jenna is sparkling with excitement, and I'm growing more nervous now by the minute.

I gulp the last of my sangria down and blink my eyes as I feel buzzed, "I don't know guys...she did text me though...after I landed yesterday morning..." I finally admit.

"Wait, she DID?!?!?" Jenna almost shouts.

"Shhhhh, keep it down! Geez!" I laugh as I shove my phone in her hand for her to read.

"Ummm, why didn't you tell me, and more importantly why didn't you reply? She really cares, Lena! I've never met the woman, and I can tell you she's nothing like Gretchen!"

"Why are you being so damn loud?" I giggle as she hands it back. "Calm down, you two! I just don't know...I messed up by running and it's unforgivable! Now, if you'll please excuse me, I need to use the ladies room." I stand, and the room spins lightly; so, I gingerly make my way back towards the restrooms.

As I do, I pull out my phone as I swallow hard and my heart pounds out of control. I think of texting Stef back, but I feel awkward, and I feel like I owe her so much more than that. I rest my head against the cool wall as I fight inwardly with myself, and I finally walk outside into the cool night air and dial her number.

STEF*

As I cleaned the guest house, tears ran down my cheeks. Everything I've done today made me tear up, and this isn't me at all. Lena Adams came into my life, changed it, then walked out, and I am not sure my heart will ever be the same. Anyone looking in would find this to be strange, but the last few weeks, I met this woman I fell madly in love with. A woman who was not only gorgeous but also goofy, serious, organized and incredibly sweet. I loved her passion and the fire that lit in her eyes when she spoke about writing and becoming an author one day.

I know it was affecting Callie as well. She kept finding me throughout the day, making excuses as to why she was around me, waiting to see if I was ok without asking then heading back to what she was doing. But I needed to get a grip. I needed to move on and focus on Callie and focus on the newest colt I've been training. I'd also be going out for a cattle drive soon, and I had to prepare for that by hiring help, and getting together with the men to figure out our plan. There was so much to be done.

Tonight, as I sit on my back porch swing, something I've been doing now for years, I watch the horizon as heat lightning flashes every now and then. I listen to the crickets chirp not far from where I'm sitting, and I hear the distant howl of a coyote. Everything is coming back into perspective for me. I've just been living life but haven't made any effort to actually LIVE. I've been going through the motions. I tell myself it's not like I'd meet another lesbian out here, but then again, I haven't really tried to go out and find anyone either. I've focused my whole life on Callie and this ranch. And that has made me happy...yet in the end, some nights I do feel lonely. Like I need someone to just hold me or to tell me I'm doing a good job. I need the tender touch of another human. I need the fire that Lena Adams awakened inside of me. The blush that crept up my chest and neck when I would see her for th her first time every morning...I needed and craved the dark brown eyes that peered into the cracks of my soul. To hear her cute giggle and watch her soft features break into a smile as she smiled with not only her full lips but also her eyes.

And soon, the tears are falling quickly again. I wipe them, angrily now. I was doing just fine! I was fine a few weeks ago! It was annoying but it had become my life turning away the different single men in town who wanted to take me to dinner. I was okay with it all. I was ok being talked about as the butch looking woman running a ranch all by herself and hiring hands to help with the cattle drives. I was fine with hiring summer help here and there and being known as the horse whisperer in these parts. Why did I have to run into her? Invite her to my ranch? Offer her a place to stay?

And as my stomach twists and I am becoming angrier, my phone begins to ring. Sniffling and quickly wiping my now puffy eyes, I look down to see that it's Lena...Lena Adams. And I do what I'm known to do: lose my cool as I toss the phone over the porch railing and hear the dull thud on the earth below. The rings soon silence as my heart races and I quickly stand as I rush off the porch towards the barn where I scream into the darkness.


	9. Chapter 9

As the date of the cattle drive draws near, I dive deeper into my work, hiring help, and appointing different jobs for each one hired. Mike, a cousin of mine and best friend, usually is my second hand man when it comes to these drives, and because we'll be leaving right when school starts, Callie will be going to stay with his wife in town until I return. The way the drive hits this year, I'm worried about possible storms especially on our way back with the cattle. I have no time at all to think about Lena or the fact that she ever was in my life for at the end of each day, I'm exhausted and the start, I dive right into work. I'm a purpose driven woman, and when I'm upset, I dive deeper into the task at hand.

On the day of the start of the drive, Callie comes downstairs to see Mike has already arrived. I'm still upstairs packing my bag, and I can hear her squeal as she greets him and her excited chatter as she's excited to get back into the swing of things entering her sophomore year of school.

As I come down the steps, I hear her excited chatter. "I'm entering the barrel races at the county fair in a couple of weeks, and I've been working really hard with Mason. He's doing really well even to the point, I barely have to give him commands!"

I wink at her as I grab my thermos, "Morning, Mike," I say as I pour the black liquid gold into the steel cup.

"Good morning to you, Stef! Ready for the ride?"

I laugh as I grab a banana and peel it, "Ready as I'll ever be. What time did you tell everyone to be here?"

He always makes himself at home; so, he finishes his bite of oatmeal before answering, "They should start showing up around 6:30. Told them we should be saddled and packed to leave by 7:30."

I nod as I sit across from him, "I'm telling you, I'm getting too old for these drives. I may just end up selling them all this year and focus on the horses. Why my father insisted on keeping them this long is beyond me!" I roll my eyes as I speak.

"I told you already I'd take them off your hands and you could just help me on the drives, silly!" He laughs as he says this, and I frown.

"That's the whole damn point! I don't want to keep doing the drives! Geez!" I chuckle as I pull out my phone. I still haven't listened to the voicemail Lena sent a couple of weeks ago, and my heart races as I remember it's there by the notifications on my phone.

I don't know what's holding me back. Maybe if I hear her voice, I'll cry or better yet, become flaming mad again. Either way, I'm done. I've closed the door on that chapter of my life. But now, once again, it nags me in the back of my head as I see the notification at the top of my screen. I sigh as I look up at Mike, "You were saying?"

Mike stands and furrows his brow, "I know that look! Spill it, Stef!" He heads over to wash his bowl.

Callie chimes in as she re enters the kitchen to grab her lunch, "Mom was stood up by that Lena chick! The one who stayed here almost two weeks and then took off with no notice!"

I glare hard at Callie, "I wasn't...stood up! It's a long story, one which we don't have time for, and you, missy, need to catch the bus unless you want to walk on your first day!"

Callie giggles as she kisses my cheek, "Be safe, Mom. Really! And I promise to do all the chores, and I have Jarrod helping me after school every day...oh, and Casey. Don't worry! Jarrod and I won't be alone!"

She adds the second part as I stare her down. This summer Jarrod came to work for me for extra money and he and Callie hit it off well. She knows how I feel about her being alone out here with just him considering how she came about.

I hug her hard and kiss her several times before I swat her butt, "I love you, Cals. Behave!" I wink as she waves and is gone.

Now ignoring the inquiring Mike, I head to wash my dishes before grabbing my hat and bag. There's a cattle drive to do, and that's what I plan on doing.

LENA*

After leaving a long ass voicemail for Stef with no response, I decide to take the job at Cheshire Publishing Company. I settle well into my role there, but each and every day is a struggle to get out of bed and go to work. I loved my other job in Chicago, and now, it's not so much the job but the realization that I'm stuck doing the same thing over and over with no time to write like I wish. By the time I get home at night, I'm exhausted and head straight for my room. I'm still with Kelly and Jenna until I find an apartment of my own. I have money tucked away, yet each time we head to look, I find something wrong or the price isn't right. The truth is simple. I'm missing Stef terribly. I can't get her out of my head. And I can't figure out as to why. She made such an impact on me, and one would think I'd be grieving over Gretchen instead. But I'm not. Gretchen has long left my memory, and each and every night as I lay in bed, I close my eyes and remember something funny Stef said or the way her hazel eyes sparkled and saw right into my soul.

FLASHBACK*

I stand here in the cool night and dial her number, and with each ring, my heart seems to pound faster. When it goes to voicemail, I pause for a moment before leaving my message:

Stef, it's Lena. I was wrong. I don't know how to apologize, and I don't make it a regular habit of running from people. I wish I could make it up to you, and I realized my error when my plane was taking off. I can never apologize enough. You deserved more: a note, a notice, something, and I took the coward's way out thinking I could run from you, from my feelings. Yes, I said feelings. I'd rather talk straight to you instead of a machine. Please call me back. I get it if I'm too late. Ok...ummm, goodbye...or...or talk to you later...

I hang up and shiver before heading back inside. Shit! Did I just tell her I have feelings for her? My heart races as my head begins to pound. I need to head home. Sleep this off...pray she calls me back...

FLASHBACK ENDS*

And that's how I left it. I check my phone every day, and no response. I plan of sending for my car soon, yet I keep putting it off as well. I don't know what I want anymore. All I know is that I'm miserable and don't know how long I can take this before exploding.


	10. Chapter 10

STEF*

"Let's stop for the night, Mike! Get some dinner cooking and a fire started! Gather the guys! We'll corral the cows temporarily! I think we have covered enough ground today!" I shouted all of this to Mike since I was the trail foreman. He would pass on the word as I kick Rusty into a gallop to make my way to the trees. From the look of the sun, I guess it to be around 6, and I can feel my stomach rumbling.

As I jump off of Rusty, I lead him over to the nearby small stream to drink before taking my pack off my saddle. I'm hot, tired and cranky as Danny comes over to start the fire. "I really appreciate all of your hard work, Dan," I say to him as I unroll my sleeping bag.

I sigh as I sit and take off my boots to rest my hot feet while I pull out my phone. I don't even know why I brought it as there is hardly any coverage out here, but in case of emergencies or if Callie needs to get ahold of me, I did. I pull out my canteen too and take a long sip before checking my messages only to see some from Callie reporting on her day and telling me how Marley is doing as well as Daffin who lightly twisted his knee earlier this week. I reply to her messages before putting my phone away and help get our simple dinner started.

As we sit to eat, the guys make small talk, but I'm lost in thought. Mike comes over with his plate of food and sits next to me. "Boss, I heard a bad storm may hit sometime by tomorrow evening. I figured since we stopped earlier today, we could get up around 4:30 to get a head start."

I nod as I listen to him. "Ya, I mean, that sounds good to me. I figure we are close to home anyways. From my calculations, we should reach home around noon Thursday."

He finishes his biscuit before replying, "But if we don't miss that storm, it could be bad. I'm thinking about the horses and even the smaller cows that we would have issues with, but like I said, we may miss it if we leave early enough."

I sigh heavily as I finish my meal. "Well, you know we can't help the weather. No matter if we waited until next week to start the drive, we still could have run into issues." I stand and head down to the stream to grab Rusty, and as I do, my heart pangs at the memory of Lena.

Lena Adams. I haven't thought of her now for over a week since right before we started the drive. I blink back tears as I remember our short swim in the stream. How girly she was, and how I found it hard to believe she grew up in the country in the first place. How shy she was to undress, then when she realized it made no difference, she took off her tank and chucked it onto the rock. I remember blushing as my eyes roamed her toned body, and my mind went to all the things I wanted to do to her.

I blush at the memory before leading Rusty in close to the camp for the night. May as well turn in for the night as we have a rough day of travel planned for tomorrow.

LENA*

"I'm completely miserable, Kelly!" Tears are running down my face as I sit here crying to my friend. Jenna has already gone to bed with a headache, and I came out of my room for a drink thinking both were in bed. Kelly had come into the kitchen to see me crying.

"Oh, honey, I know you are. We can tell by how you've put off finding an apartment and how you've pulled away," Kelly rubs my back as I continue to cry.

"She never called me back or even texted me! I knew she'd never forgive me! What was I thinking?" I'm now wailing as I slide to the floor against the kitchen island, and Kelly moves to sit beside me as she takes my hand.

"Do you want to know my opinion?" She asks as she pushes my wild hair out of my face so she can see my eyes.

I look over at her as I sniffle like a baby, "Just spit it out! You know you want to." I sound forlorn and heartbroken.

"I think you should take your pretty little ass back there and eat crow. Keep your head low and write. She offered it and even texted that the offer still stands. So, take her for her word! Get your ass back over there and write! Show your face every once in awhile and make her remember you!"

I listen to her as she has a twinkle in her eyes which makes me giggle as I wipe the rest of my tears. "Well, I guess I should tuck my tail between my legs and go...but what about my job?"

"Forget the job, Len!!!! Jesus Christ! You hate it! It's not you anymore! Go live! Follow your dream and write! Not too many writers get this opportunity!" she pushes against me softly as she looks in my eyes. I'm so grateful for both Kelly and Jenna. I met them in college and we have stayed in touch since.

I reach over and wrap my arms around her as I reply, "Thanks, Kelly! I don't know what I would do without you two! You keep me sane!" I kiss her cheek and stand. "I caught a red eye here. I'm sure I can catch a red eye back."

She stands as well as she laughs softly, "Don't worry about hurting Jenna. She'll be beyond excited you finally stopped being so damn stubborn!"

I laugh as I head to my room and pull down my luggage. I'm both nervous and excited about actually doing something out of my comfort zone. I've never ever chased a woman, and I've never quit a job to actually write. This will prove to be an adventure and a half for me.

As my taxi pulls up to the ranch, my heart is racing out of control. Never in a million years did I think I'd find myself back here, but here I am. I look at my watch and see it's only noon, and I'm unsure what to expect. I make my way towards the guest house and am surprised to see it unlocked. As I turn the knob, I quietly walk in the room although I have no idea why I'm sneaking. I look around and everything is as I left it, neat and clean. As I run my fingers over the soft bedspread, I wonder where Stef is this time of day. I sit on the edge of the bed and stare at my phone.

I decide to call her, yet when I do, a message states the person I am trying to reach is out of range. I bite my bottom lip as I think. Out of range? My heart thuds as I try to come up with where she might be when it dawns on me that she's probably out somewhere working on the ranch. I laugh softly as this realization hits because most people are working this time of day. I quickly begin unpacking my things before I decide to call a cab into town so I can see about getting my car.


	11. Chapter 11

LENA*

I hear the school bus at the end of the long lane, and as I watch Callie walk up with this older boy, my heart races. If I know Stef, she wouldn't be happy that Callie was alone here with this boy. I walk halfway to meet them, and as she sees me, she turns pale.

"Lena?" she fidgets with her backpack as I greet her.

"Who's your friend?" I ask as I eye the boy and he looks at me with a goofy grin as he holds out his hand.

"Hi, I'm Jarrod...Jarrod Athens. Stef hired me for summer help, and I've been helping Callie this past week since her mom is gone."

I shake his hand, and Callie rolls her eyes as she eyes me warily. "Does my mom know you're here?"

I sigh as I shake my head, "No, I just came in today." I look over at Jarrod, "You said that Stef was gone? May I ask when she'll be back?"

Callie brushes between me and Jarrod as we reach the house, "I don't know, Lena, but maybe you shouldn't be here when she does. She is over you."

Jarrod looks at me confused as I blush softly. He looks like he feels badly for Callie's rudeness, and he quickly chimes in, "Stef is out on her cattle drive, and if I know her, she'll try to be back by the weekend. She usually doesn't like to be gone for more than two weeks."

I sit on the porch swing as I nod. "Do you know which route she takes? For the drive?"

Callie rolls her eyes and storms into the house as the screen door slams behind her, and Jarrod answers me, "Yes. She has it mapped out just in case she needs to be found for any reason. Why?"

I laugh softly. He's a far cry different towards me than Callie, and also he's like a breath of fresh air. I really like this kid although I'm almost sure if Stef knew he was here alone with her daughter, she'd not be very happy. "Well, I'd love to see that map. Ummm, if you think she'll be back by the weekend, I could go out and meet her."

He takes off his cowboy hat as he hands me a pad, "Here it is, but I wouldn't recommend you go out there alone. I mean, I'm not trying to be mean, but I couldn't see you surviving it out there by yourself."

I look it over before answering him, "Go with me. I mean if you want to. I know you have school...nevermind. I shouldn't take you out of school..."

Callie comes out to hear the tail end of the conversation, and she walks over and snatches the notepad out of my hands, "You'd never survive it, Lena! And I told you, my mom is over you! You should be gone by Friday at the latest!" Her face is red as she shoves the notepad back into Jarrod's hands. "You ready to do the chores?"

His face is red as he looks at me apologetically and places his hat back on his head, "Ya, lets go get this done..." he then places the pad on the porch railing as he follows Callie to the stables.

STEF*

"Hi-yaaaaa!!!!!" I circle my rope as I lasso a small calf who refused to stay with the herd. We had been able to travel enough miles so that we missed the storm that was supposed to hit. All I wanted was to get these cattle into town tomorrow so that that could be shipped off on time. I'm exhausted and just ready to get back and shower and sleep in my own bed.

As we make camp for the night, I check my phone like normal only I realize I have no service. I sigh as I shut it off and head to start my normal routine. As I wash my face and hands, Mike walks up beside me to do the same, "Great job today, boss!"

I grab a towel and wipe my face, "Geez, thanks, Mike!" I playfully nudge him. "This time tomorrow I'll be in my own shower! Good god! I'm so ready for this to be over!"

"Only half a day left!" I wink at him as I head off, but he calls after me. "Hey, Stef, can I ask you something?"

I turn around, my hat in hand, "Shoot."

"Well, I was serious when I said I'd buy the cattle you don't sell tomorrow. Take it off your hands..."

I eye him as I raise my eyebrow, "You have time to take care of cattle, Mike? I know you're busy helping Jason with his vet work." Jason is the town's vet, and he travels to the ranches and farms in the area, and Mike has been his assistant for years.

He sighs as he walk up beside me and we walk side by side to grab our food. "Well, I kinda have been hankering to get back into cattle for a while, and Anna agreed now would be the time for me to do it. It'll be my main job and I'll only help Jason on the side."

"So, you've thought this thru then, yes?" I grab an apple and a sandwich before heading to sit under a tree.

"Ya, I have, Stef. I know you're overworked. Let me do this for you. We'll be doing each other a favor."

I bite into my apple as I sit Indian style and look at the horizon as the sun sets, "Well, Mike, like I said, I'm done being a cattle rancher. So, actually it would be a huge help. But it will be a pretty penny...you know my dad has had cattle for years..." I look over at him as I await his answer.

He nods, "I know, and I've been saving up."

"Then it's settled," I reach out my hand to shake his, and he shakes it heartily. I stand and stretch. "Now, if you don't mind, I'm gonna hit the hay. This old girl is exhausted and cranky."

He laughs as I head off to grab my sleeping bag and make my bed. As soon as my head hits the pillow, I'm out. I'm so happy tomorrow I'll see my baby girl.

"Stef! Wake up!!!! Quick! The wind is picking up!" Mike is shaking me awake, and as I jolt up, I realize it's starting to rain, and the wind is terrible. My heart rate picks up as I realize I could sleep through anything, and this is very serious. My crew is scurrying as they each pitch in breaking up the camp.

"Mike! We have to get to the cattle!" I holler above a boom of thunder as running towards Rusty who is beginning to become skiddish. We've been caught in storms in times past, and we all knew what to expect. Yet the blackness of the night still makes it difficult to see much especially since our fire had long burned out.

The next few hours are spent trying to keep the cattle from running off, keeping the horses calm and doing our damn best not to blow away. As the storm subsides, we are drenched, exhausted and thankful to have survived. We walk around to access the damage, and as we finish up with the cattle count, Danny runs up towards us shouting, "Stef! Mike! Come quick! There's a woman stuck back on the trail!" He reaches us, out of breath, and I look at him alarmed.

"Slow down, Dan...now, start from the beginning," I turn to face him, and Mike runs up as well.

"This tree fell across the trail, and I saw it as I went to grab Trooper. I heard someone calling for help, and turned to see this woman with part of the tree on her leg. We need to go get it off her. She looks like she's hurt really badly too." He looks pale, and I nod as Mike has already gone to grab some tools from his saddle bag, and I quickly grab the first aid kit we bring with us.

"Grab a blanket, Danny, and a few over guys. C'mon! We best not leave her out there too long," I saddle and jump on Rusty as we head off to help the woman.


	12. Chapter 12

"Rusty, c'mon, boy!" I urge my horse up the trail even though he wants nothing to do with headed this way having sensed that something was up ahead. Mike and Danny have arrived at the fallen tree before me as Rusty is being stubborn. When I pull back on the reigns, he snorts and stops suddenly catching me off guard pushing me forward. "Woahhh, boy," I jump down rubbing his neck to calm him before grabbing the giant flashlight in my saddle bag.

As I near the tree, I shine the light to guide my steps and see the back of the woman. She looks drenched as we all are, and I realize I left the blanket on my saddle. "Dang it!" I sputter as I turn back to retrieve it and hurry back.

"Why did you ride out here alone?" I hear Mike questioning the woman, and she replies, her voice sounding pained.

"I thought I'd be ok. I've ridd..." she stops as I shine the flashlight on her and inhales sharply.

It takes me a minute to figure out why she does, and my heart nearly comes to a grinding hault as I realize who it is, "Lena?" I hear my voice sound distant and small as our eyes lock.

"You know this woman?" Mike inquires curiously as he stands.

"We've met..." I don't elaborate as my jaw clenches, and I unroll the blanket to wrap around her shoulders. As I kneel to do so, I whisper in her ear, "You are alive! Fancy seeing you out here..."

I stand, my anger boiling inside of me, and I become all business as we spend the next two hours hacking and sawing at the tree enough to pull her out from underneath. We manage to get her up on Rusty before I hoist myself up behind her.

"Thank you," she whispers barely audible as I nudge Rusty to head back to camp.

LENA*

Stef helps me to a sleeping bag that was an extra, one of the many that didn't get wet in the storm, and she kneels down to take a look at my leg. I watch her as she pulls out a pair of scissors. "I'm going to try to be gentle, but I need to cut away your jeans, ok?"

My heart thuds in my chest as I nod and brush back my drying hair out of my face. She has set up a battery lit lantern and has the first aid kit opened with the necessary things needed. I grimace as she grabs the hem and begins to cut, sucking air through my teeth as I realize the skin must be broken underneath. "Are you ok?" She stops as she looks up at me."

"Uh-huh..." I manage as tears spring to my eyes, and I quickly wipe them away with the back of my hand.

She cuts all the way past my knee before setting the scissors down and ripping open the jean material as she inspects my swollen leg. "It may be broken; so, I'm going to clean it the very best I can and splint it." She swallows as she looks up at me, and for a moment, we lock eyes again, and I can't tell if what I'm seeing is anger, pain or sympathy. I feel as if what I'm reading from her is cloudy. Her fingers move deftly as she cuts cloth and uses antiseptic to clean the cuts and dried blood. I squeeze my eyes shut trying hard not to moan or groan or be a big baby, but my leg is throbbing so badly, I feel like I'm going to be sick. It doesn't help that I know me and Stef need to talk, and it's killing me that I have put us in this very predicament.

After she wraps and splinters my leg, she hands me ibuprofen and some water for the pain, "Lie back. I'll bring you a pillow." Her voice has softened some which makes me want to burst into tears, and I do as she says as I wait for her to return. I love this woman. I knew it as soon as I saw her face tonight. I have been fighting it, and we are now at odds because of my foolishness and because of my cowardly ways. I have no earthly clue how I am going to make this right. Will she ask me to leave as soon as I am all fixed and better? Callie had said that she was over me, but even if that's true, I do know Callie well enough to know she didn't ever really care for me anyway and could be just saying that.

"Here you go, my love," she returns and says this softly as she again is kneeling, this time by my head. I lift my head as she lays it beneath it, and as I lay my head back down, I feel her fingers brush down my cheek as she says hoarsely, "What the hell made you ride a trail you've never ridden not knowing what to expect as well as riding it alone? Hmmm? That was about the dumbest thing you could ever have done, Lena..." Her voice catches some as her nose twitches.

Now the tears begin to fall sideways down my cheeks as I sniffle, "I needed to get to you! I needed to apologize and make everything right again!"

I move my hands to cover my eyes as she says nothing, and I have no idea what she is feeling in this moment. All I know is that I want it to be over so we can continue where we left off, but she doesn't feel that way as she clears her throat, moving to get back up. "Well, if you need anything, I'll be right over there. Just call my name. We'll be leaving in a couple of hours after we are able to get some sleep." She sounds all business-like, and I can't say that I blame her. My eyes soon grow heavy as I drift off to sleep, and the last face and voice in my mind is that of Stefanie Marie Foster.

Do you think Stef is being too hard on Lena?


	13. Chapter 13

As we near Wood River Ridge Ranch, I'm thankful as my trip in the back of the pickup truck was a rough one. Danny was driving, and since I was in the bed along with the camping gear, it was like I was cargo being hauled over bumpy and uncomfortable terrain. Stef had gone with the cattle straight into town to meet the truck come to take them to slaughter for beef.

She barely spoke to me this morning, yet was so sensitive to my needs and had such a gentle touch which proceeded to confuse me. I wonder why she never answered the voicemail I left, yet I never did text her back. I still said in my voicemail that I'd like to talk to her. My mind is telling me that she's not much of a talker when it comes to deep conversations, yet my heart is telling me that she wants to talk and just hasn't found the right opportunity.

Before we came back to the ranch, we did stop by the doctor's office where I was found to have broken my ankle. The whole time I was there, the doctor kept talking about Stef and her ranch, and after a while it became just awkward considering I began to realize he most likely had a "thing" for her.

I sigh as Danny helps me insider the guest house, and I feel relieved that Callie is still in school although I know the bus will be rolling up eventually. "Do you need anything else, Lena?" Danny asks me as I push back on the pillows behind me.

I shake my head, "No, but thank you so much. I think I'll be ok…"

He nods as he sets my crutches where I can reach them then leaves. I sigh as I lay back. I need to shower badly and wash my hair. I feel disgusting. Somehow I'll figure it out but for now, I plan on enjoying the peace and quiet.

STEF*

"It sure looks like you did a good job with keeping up with your chores, Cal," I squeeze her again for what seems like the hundredth time since I got home. When I arrived home, I showered then went to check on Lena whom I found sound asleep; so, I left her alone and met Callie as she was walking up the lane from the bus.

"Thanks, Mom," she beams as she kisses my cheek then heads to grab the veggies for our salad.

"So, I'm sure you know that Lena is back? When did she get in?" I ask her as I watch for her reaction as we work on dinner together.

Her face tightens, and I can see that spark of protection flare up in her. "Oh, ummm, she met me when I got off the bus on Wednesday. I told her to leave before you got back, but when I went to brush down Pegasus, not only was he gone but also I noticed some gear missing as well…" she chops the cucumbers as she tells me this.

"Mmm…" I mumble as she answers my question. My heart races as I remember what she told me last night.

I had to see you. I had to try and make everything right!

"Mom?" Callie breaks my thoughts.

"Yes, baby? Sorry my mind wandered…"

"Oh, I was asking if she was ok?"

I'm shocked at Callie's caring question, and I swallow as I head to grab the salad tongs. "Danny told me she broke her ankle. All of the gear she brought with her was destroyed, but Pegasus and she are ok and that's all that matters." I smile weakly at her as she takes it all in.

"Do you forgive her?" Callie asks softly as she turns to face me.

I sigh as I look up to see her soft brown eyes searching mine for answers, "Well, she did kind of risk her life to get to me…" I say this as my voice shakes some.

"Oh, Mom…" I blink back tears as I feel Callie's tenderness as she brushes my arm. "Go get her for dinner, Mom. I'll try my hardest to remain neutral for your sake…"

I pull her into my arms as I kiss her head and squeeze her, "When did you become so mature? I love you so much, Cal."

We have our moment broken by a soft familiar voice, "Did you ever listen to my voicemail?"

LENA*

I hold myself up the best I can on my crutches as I ask her this pointed question. I had woken up earlier and decided to try and clean up. I did manage to clean my body and hair the best I could, but the pain got to be way too much, and I had to take several breaks thus taking me over an hour to do something that wouldn't normally take me so long.

I watch as Callie and Stef pull away from their mother/daughter embrace and look at me. Pink tinges Stef's face, and I can tell that Callie is biting her tongue hard. I had heard the majority of their conversation, and something tells me that Stef most likely didn't listen to the voicemail I left for her.

"Ummm, well…" Stef begins to answer me as she grabs the salad bowl and places it in the middle of the table.

"Don't worry about it…" I finally say as I make my way around the table to the counter. "Do you need help with anything?" I ask absentmindedly just wanting to eat and head back to the guesthouse. I'm exhausted mentally, emotionally and physically and have no fight left within me.

Stef realizes I'm hobbling on my crutches and quickly grabs my arm, "How you can help is by sitting your pretty ass down and propping that foot up!" There's some bite to her bark as she leads me to a chair and quickly grabs a couch pillow to prop my foot up on the chair beside me.

"Thanks, Stef," I sat softly as she adjusts the pillow and stands. She reaches out to touch my face then stops. My heart races as we look at each other for a moment. We need to talk at some point, but I know now isn't the time especially when Callie interrupts us.

"The chicken is almost done, everyone!" She is leaning over the overnight door checking it, and Stef's and my trance is broken for the time being.

"What would you like to drink, love?" Stef asks almost business like as she heads to grab glasses for us.

"Water, please," I reply softly as I begin playing with the napkins.

Dinner is quiet for all of us, even awkward at some points, but when I finally eat as much as I can which is barely anything, I stand, grab my crutches and begin heading for the door. "Thanks for dinner. I'm headed to retire for the evening…"

Callie stands quickly to clear the dishes. "You should stay up here, Lena. You're kind of handicapped for the time being. You can have the guest room."

Stef looks at her like someone has taken over her daughter's body, in shock as she soon echoes her offer. "Yes, stay here, Lena, at least for now…" she adds the last part as she looks away from me.

I bite my bottom lip as I tell myself not to cry. This is not going to be easy by any means, yet why is Callie changing her treatment of me all of the sudden?


	14. Chapter 14

LENA*

Sitting here in the bed surrounded by all of Stef's things, I feel so comfortable yet apprehensive because I'm still unsure as to what Stef is thinking. I want to talk to her, but she seems so closed off. To be honest, I can't deal with trying to break down a wall. I'm still healing from the emotional abuse of my past relationship, and I know it's unfair to compare Stef to Gretchen at this point. No, this one is all on me. I am the one who ran, and I'm the one who came back and my plan to reunite in some dramatically romantic kind of way backfired. So, I'm here.

I sigh as my head starts to hurt from all of this thinking, and the blank page on my laptop is screaming at me. I thought I could sit here and possibly start on the writing, but all I've managed to write is one word: Home. I growl softly in frustration as I slam my laptop shut, and swing my legs to the side as I reach for my crutches. Standing up, I finally have my balance as I begin heading for the kitchen to grab a glass of water, but as I make my way down the hallway, I come face to face with the person I have not been able to get out of my mind, Stefanie Marie Foster.

STEF*

I see Lena trying to make her way down the hallway and quickly run to grab her arm. "I told you to text me if you needed anything, stubborn woman!" I can feel the sadness flowing from her as she looks away, and I can't help the love that is flooding through me towards her right now.

"I didn't want to bother you for a drink of water," she says softly as our eyes meet, and I reach over to brush her face as I watch it turn a beautiful shade of pink.

"Well, I meant what I said. All you have to do is text me or holler my name, and I'd help you..." She continues to blush making it become awkward between us; so, I finally change the subject as I ask, "Do you want to come sit with me? In the living room?"

"Yes, if you don't mind..." she seems hesitant as if she's scared, and that alone breaks my heart. I've been kind of hard on her since I saw her stuck under that tree on the trail. My stubbornness gets the best of me sometimes, and this is the end result: someone who is skittish and unsure how to be around me.

I nod warmly as I help her to the big couch in the living room and help prop her leg before quickly grabbing two glasses of water. When I return, she is quietly flipping channels on the TV. "Here you go, sweets," I say softly as I sit next to her.

She thanks me then sips the water, and I watch her before I finally speak again. "Can we talk now?" I wait for her to answer as it's quiet now except for the drone of the cooking channel where she landed after scrolling for a bit. My heart thuds in my chest as I await her response which seems to be taking forever.

Finally turning the TV off, she nods slowly, "Yes, I just thought it was beyond that. That I was only still here out of duty until I'm better..." she says all of this without looking my way, and it's as if she looks at me, I'll only confirm her fears.

And this breaks my heart as I move to take her hand, "Lena..." my heart is breaking as I see the tears forming in her eyes. Tilting her chin so she is looking at me, I continue, "Lena...baby..."

Tears are silently streaming down her caramel cheeks, and I move my thumbs to brush them away. "I know you've been hurt. And so have I. But I'm of a mind that we start this thing here all over again from the beginning, as if nothing ever happened in our pasts, and just focus on what we...what we have fallen in love with..."

Her breath catches as I say the latter, and she moves to link our fingers and squeezes my hand. "I love you, too...and I know that seems crazy. But I do want to get to know you. I love what I see, and what I've observed so far with you. I love your smile, Stef, and the way you carry yourself unafraid of what others may think. I love how you care so very much for the people who surround you. I watched you as you took charge on that trail ride back earlier today, and how you respected your men and they respected you. I'm so sorry I ran, Stef!" She is rambling now needing to get it all out, and I let her. "I was scared and it was selfish of me to leave in the fashion that I did. You didn't deserve that. You don't deserve that...at all! And I was scared of what I was feeling in that moment! I was scared that I could possibly be feeling what I was feeling after having my heart stomped on by Gretchen, but if I was truly being honest with myself, my relationship ended with her a long time ago...when she became comfortable and assumed things were okay between us. I had been hurting for some time but was clinging to a relationship that had already died. And meeting you? Meeting you, Stef, was the best thing that's actually happened to me in a very long time, and the effect you had on me carried with me and haunted me when I was in Seattle and trying to move on...to the point I was so miserable that I had to come back and see what this...this was!" She finally finishes her speech, her cheeks pink and breathing heavier.

"Oh, honey, we all make mistakes...I am one stubborn woman, myself, and I had part in this as well. It wasn't just you. So don't you take this whole thing on yourself...ok?" My thumb rubs the soft skin of her hand as I look down at our linked fingers. I love the softness and delicateness of her long fingers in mine.

"Yes...so, we...we're starting over? Clean slate?" She looks at me, hopeful, and I melt as I reach to brush her cheek and I lean closer.

"Yes...starting over. New day..." my breathing is ragged now as all I want to do is kiss this woman. Kiss her and hold her and just love on her. I feel something awakening inside of me that I haven't felt in a long time.

"Stef?" She whispers as our eyes lock. "Stef, are you ok?" Her voice sounds ragged as well, and I pull back as I blush. I will not kiss her ever again without her permission. I did before, and she ended up fleeing town.

"Mhmm...I'm ok, sweetie..." I squeeze her hand now as she lays her head on my shoulder. I flip the TV back on, and we enjoy each other's presence. This woman not only is permeating every part of me, but also, she is beginning to feel like home.


	15. Chapter 15

LENA*

Everyday brings me closer to her, and I am overwhelmed by the love she shows me in whatever she does. I've never had anyone be so in tune to my needs as well as so intense in focusing on me. Today, I had my cast taken off, and I'm determined to head out to ride and write some on my book. I've already managed to finish a first draft of my book, but starting on the second draft has become quite challenging for some reason.

Stef is busy working with several of her horses as I walk into the barn to saddle one of the horses. She sees me and instantly walks over to me. "What's up, sweets?" I smile widely as I take in her muscular arms and legs. Just sweeping my eyes over her toned body, my heart races.

"I thought I'd take one of the horses out on a ride?"

"Oh, no, you don't...last time you went alone, you wound up hurt. I can take a break and go with you." She winks as I place my hand on my hip. But I don't argue with her. She knows her way around here anyway. Plus, I kind of hoped she'd offer to ride along.

"I already packed a lunch. I can grab more if you want?" I ask as she brings out Apollo and Pegasus.

"Whatever you want, babe. I'll saddle both horses." I blush at the loving term and quickly head to pack more food and water. We soon are on our way away from the barn, and she takes me down a different shady trail than the last time we went for a trail ride. We chit chat comfortably, but I find myself zoning out more and more as I listen to her voice, and watch how she manages her horse.

"Hey, wanna stop here?" I call out after a while, and she obliges as I pull down a blanket to lay under the shade as the horses head off to graze.

She easily slides her hand in mine as I sit Indian style on the blanket and remove my hat. "Are you feeling ok? Your ankle ok?"

"Yes, as good as new!" I smile shakily as she looks in my eyes. I bite my lower lip as she squeezes my hand. "Can I ask you something?"

"Anything, my love," she smiles sweetly at me as her hand runs up and down my arm now giving me goosebumps.

My stomach flutters now as I ask softly, "Do you mind if I kiss you?"

I hear her throat clear as her body shifts and her fingers now tilt my chin so I'm looking at her. "Look at me..." her voice is soft and warm yet husky.

Looking in her eyes, I have my answer, and I lean in slowly until my hand rests softly on her cheek and my lips brush hers. A soft whimper escapes her as I do this, and a fire is awakened inside the both of us as we are gripping each other's necks, tangling our fingers in the others hair. I find myself straddling her as I deepen the kiss letting her know I'm not running. As we stop for air, she kisses down my jawline murmuring, "I thought...you'd never...do this...baby..."

I smile as my heart hammers while her hand gently tugs on my long curls guiding my head back so she can have access to my long neck, running her tongue in such a way my fingers tug and pull on her overalls. "Ahhhh, Stef..." I moan breathlessly.

"Shhhhhhh..." she croons as she quickly moves us so I'm laying on the blanket and she's above me. We kiss and explore for what seems like forever until we both are so worked up, we know we'll have to either stop or keep going.

STEF*

"Baby...tell me..." I command in her ear as I feel the intensity from her tugs and kisses. I want her to tell me, to show me what she wants. Not because I feel insecure but because I need her to be somewhat in control. My body is on fire, and I've never felt such a connection with anyone, not even Russ when I was sleeping with him on a regular basis trying to prove to myself I liked it.

I feel her unhook my overalls before sliding her hands underneath my tank. "How alone are we out here?" She asks breathlessly and I smile as I sit up and lift it off as well as unhook my bra.

"Very alone...so alone that I can do this..." I lift off her shirt and run my hand between her black laced bra. I watch her nipples harden beneath the fabric which quickens my desire, and I lean in and tug them through the fabric. My stomach flutters out of control as her body responds to my touch, and soon our lips are crashing again as our bodies move against each other.

"Baby...love..." she gasps after we've kissed for what seems like forever.

"Mmmm..." I moan as I'm so wrapped up in her, her scent, her curves, her moans and sighs.

She manages to run her hand between us, over the curve of my breast and up to my throat as she pushes softly. "Babe...we should stop..."

I freeze as my hands have been exploring her, and I look in her eyes, my face flushed and hot. "Are you panicking?" My hand moves to brush lightly over her flushed cheek.

"No...just...slowly...outside...nervous..." she manages between whimpers as she shudders beneath me. I bury my face in her neck and allow my tongue to explore behind her ear and when I nip her earlobe, I smile because her breath catches and her hips buck up into mine causing me to moan loudly.

"Let me touch you," I moan and practically beg as my hand inches closer to her center. I hear her sharp inhale as her lips search for mine, and soon I'm inside her jeans and then panties. My fingers deftly find her swollen lips, and when they dip into her wetness, she nips at my tongue causing me pleasurable pain. As I circle her hardened clit, her hips push against my hand telling me to move faster.

I begin memorizing what she likes as I become almost frantic wanting to please her. Pushing up on one arm, I look in her eyes as I brush her cheek softly. "I love you..."

"Stef!" Her head goes back as she bucks against me and tumbles over the edge, whimpering my name over and over. I soon cover her lips with mine as I gather her close to my body, feeling the waves wash over her into me. "I love you, too..."


	16. Chapter 16

"I want you to know that you'll always have first place in my heart, baby girl," my hand slides into Callie's as we stand by the corral fence after working with our newest colt, Marley, after her schoolday. Callie had been quiet since walking in from the bus, and I know that I need to talk to her. For it was apparent that Lena and I were a couple, and I knew it would be unfair to keep it from my baby.

"I've known you liked her, Mom," my daughter deadpans even though she squeezes my hand.

I watch her profile for any indication of emotion, good or bad. "Are you ok with this? With her?"

She shrugs and adjusts her hat as she hops up on the top rail. "Mom, you've been so happy, but I'm not so sure Lena likes me."

"What do you mean? I have never seen her be anything but kind and nice to you, Cals!"

"I just don't think she's used to having a kid. Or being around kids...what if she tries to talk you into sending me away?"

"What are you talking about, love?" I move quickly to take her hands in mine as I look deep into her eyes. I want to know where this doubt is coming from, and why my baby feels this way.

"I guess I wasn't too nice to her when she first came here..." she looks down as she plays with the rip in her jeans. "And I'm not so sure she ever told you what happened the second day she was here..." her face flushes and my heart begins to thud.

"Callie? Look at me, please," I become firm as I wonder what she hasn't told me. "When? Here at the house? Or the first time she was here?"

She clears her throat as she tries to pull away, "Mom, I'm so sorry...I was really angry. It was right after she got hurt, and I invited her to stay...you were with Mike finalizing the sale of the cattle part of our ranch...I'm sorry, Mom..."

Her voice cracks and I practically bark at her, "You better start talking..."

FLASHBACK*

After Stef left in her big green truck, Callie ran to see if Lena was still on the back porch with her coffee. She had been watching her all morning, and as she watched her mother talk softly to the woman, she became increasingly angry. Angry that she came back into their lives after breaking her mother's heart. Angry because it seemed that her mother had forgiven her so easily. Angry because she had put Pegasus' life in danger by going out on that trail without a guide. Angry at herself for inviting her to stay at the house while trying to "play nice" for her mom.

Bursting through the screen door, Callie spotted Lena on the far left on her laptop, leg propped up. "Last night I was just trying to play nice for Mom, but I was serious when I said you should leave!" She placed her hand on her hip as she stood in front of the woman.

Lena looked up a bit startled at the outburst. "I'm sorry you feel this way, Callie. I'm not so sure that your mother feels the same as you, though."

"She does but won't say it because she's too nice..."

"Wait a second," Lena cut off the girl, "How can you be so sure? This sounds like it's all coming from you, Cals..."

The girl's face turned red at the pet name used. "Don't call me Cals! Just stop!!!!" She sputtered before storming off towards the barn. Who did this woman think she was coming in here and interrupting their perfectly good life AFTER almost destroying her mother? She wouldn't allow this to keep destroying her mother. She would make sure she hated it here so much, she'd leave on her own accord.

FLASHBACK ENDS*

Stef brushed Callie's face as she finished her rendition of what happened that morning. She had already known about it, but had heard only Lena's side which didn't sound as harsh as Callie was telling it. She knew Lena would never try to come between her and her daughter, and even expressed that evening that she would gladly leave straight away if that were the case.

FLASHBACK*

She buried her face her hands as tears ran down her cheeks. "I could never ever come between you and your baby, Stef! Look at the mess I've created by my one moment of fear!"

Stef pulled her hands down. "Shhhhh, my love...Callie only knows me and her...and her grandfather when he was living. She'll come around, and it sounds like she's scared now. She saw me fall apart, and she's afraid I will again. But what is a relationship or love if two people don't try and conquer their fears together? We can do this...last night we promised to start over, yes?"

Lena looked into the blondes earnest eyes as she wiped her tears, and all she saw was the truest purest kind of love she'd ever seen in anyone towards her. "How can you forgive me so easily?" She whispered as her voice trembled. She couldn't get over it considering she hadn't really forgiven herself as of yet.

"I do. I did. Last night, I made the decision based on knowing I've made some foolhardy decisions of my own in the past..." she then wrapped her arm around the caramel skinned woman as she breathed her in and whispered only for her. "And I don't want to lose you again...I've dreamed of you several times, and each time I've woken up with this deep ache in my chest wondering what could have been..." The blonde moved to tilt Lena's chin. "And now, I get to know..."

The curly haired woman smiled softly as Stef rested her forehead on hers. "Callie will come around..."

FLASHBACK ENDS*

"I'm glad you told me, love," I whisper to the girl. "Do you think you'd feel comfortable talking to her now? Maybe trying to clear the air and starting fresh and new? Hmmm?"

Callie finally looked at her mother for the first time since she started the story. "Yes," her whispered promise made Stef's heart almost burst, for she knew that now they could move forward in becoming a family.


	17. Chapter 17

LENA*

Saturday morning as we finish our late breakfast in silence, I notice Callie is more quiet than normal. It doesn't help that Stef left early to head into town. She was attending the council meeting/pancake breakfast, hoping to stop the oil company, Drewery, from coming and trying to drill on the surrounding ranches. She had forgotten that I had promised to help Callie practice her jumping; so, when it was apparent I'd be teaching Callie alone, I was a little apprehensive.

"We're still practicing the jumps this morning, yes?" I sip my lukewarm coffee as I watch play with her eggs.

"I suppose. Think you can handle Dusty?" she doesn't meet my eyes. Last night we had talked, and she had apologized extensively, yet I could tell she was somewhat nervous to be alone with me.

"Tell you what. If I can't handle Dusty, I'll stop, ok? I want you to trust me, Callie...please," I say softly as I lean forward hoping to get her to look at me. When she does, I smile softly.

"Ok, Lena, I'll do the dishes if you go and saddle Dusty and Aries."

I wink as I stand and pull my wild hair on top of my head. Sometimes Callie seemed so grown up while other times she was like a child. I remember being her age, yet it seemed as if Stef gave her way too much freedom in my opinion. But I'd keep my opinion to myself.

As I pull Dusty out of her stall, I smile as she neighs softly. "Hey, girl," I pat her strong neck. She's been Stef's horse now for going on 5 years, and it seems like she doesn't take to too many people. Yet somehow she knows I'm special to Stef; so, she welcomes me as I saddle her. After saddling Dusty, I muck her stall and fill her water all the while waiting on Callie.

After over half an hour goes by, I wonder where in the world Calli can be; so, I head indoors only to find the dishes unwashed and Callie nowhere to be found. My heart begins to race as I call out for her. "Callie?" Running upstairs and checking all of the rooms, she's nowhere to be found. I don't wish to bother Stef especially if Callie is somewhere on the ranch. So, I run outside and jump on Dusty, doing the only thing I know to do: look for Callie.

Callie knew it wasn't right what she was about to do, but at this point, she just didn't care. Her mother was all wrapped up in this new woman, and she felt all alone. Losing her grandfather earlier last year had put a giant hole in her heart, and she had filled that hole with her mother. Stef stepped in and became the girls rock, and she now had someone else.

Callie had talked a good game with both Stef and Lena, fooling them both her her generosity and kind words. Her grand apology even backed with tears had seemed to reach down to both of the women's hearts. She felt a little guilty deceiving her mother like this, but at this point, she felt she had no choice.

Jarrod had promised to take care of her, and she didn't care that he was 18 as she was only 15. All she cared was that his promise of a better life in the rodeo sounded much better than being at home with her mom and Lena. Jarrod had finally gotten sponsored for his rodeo card, and he was leaving today. Callie had stayed up all night deciding what to pack and what to leave behind. Once she made up her mind to do this, there was no turning back. She had also sat down and written a letter to her mother trying to explain the best she could that she would be alright. No matter how hard she tried, she didn't think it would be fair to leave her mother without any kind of good-bye, for she wasn't completely heartless.

As soon as Lena had gone out to the stables to saddle Dusty, Callie knew she had to move and move quickly. There was no time to do the dishes or clean the kitchen as she had promised, for she had to be gone by the time Lena realized she wasn't coming out to the stables. She quickly called Jarrod and told him to meet her at the end of the lane before hurrying out with her bags.

"Hey, Jarrod! Thanks for picking me up!" The boy smiled as he got out to help her put her suitcase and bags in the back of his pick-up.

"I didn't really think you'd want to come, Cals. Last night, you weren't sure. I'm so glad you decided."

Callie jumped in the front seat nervously as she leaned over and planted a kiss on his cheek. "I figured I may as well take you up on your offer; plus, we can work together on the team rodeo challenges like we practiced."

Jarrod smiled as he put his truck in gear and took off down the road. Callie felt free. Yes, her mom would be sad, but she'd get over it. She knew that she would be 16 soon, and by the time Stef found her, there'd be no way she could make her come back home. She wouldn't live here with Lena. Stef had chosen her over Callie, and she couldn't live here with them and have a new "mother" with that knowledge. Hopefully one day Stef would forgive her daughter, but for now, Callie knew that she'd just have to find a way to move forward without her best friend.

"Come on, boy, where is she?" my heart is pounding as we head down the trail alongside the creek. I know I need to call Stef soon, for the sun is high overhead, and the heat is unbearable. Jumping off of Dusty, I lead him over to the water to drink as I pull my hair up and take my shirt off tying it around my waist. I sink to the grassy bank and bury my face in my hands.

Why am I so worried? Something didn't seem right about me not finding Callie yet. Not only were the dishes not done which wasn't like her at all, but also, no horses were missing. I pick up rocks and begin to skip them in the water as my mind begins to reel. Where could she have gone? I would've heard a car pull up the drive or Snickers would've alerted me to anyone on the premises.

I sigh as I lean back some and tilt my head back as I close my eyes. I made a promise to Stef that I wouldn't ever go alone on these trails, and yet here I am. Pulling out my phone, I stare at her number as I dread making the call. Would she blame me? Would she say this is my fault that Callie is missing? Would she tell me to get out? I know deep in my heart of hearts she really wouldn't, but we were just now getting to a really good place. I felt close to her. I couldn't come between a girl and her mother. I just couldn't. Tears sting my eyes as I think of all of these worse case scenarios. I finally hit the call button, dialing Stef's number.


	18. Chapter 18

FLASHBACK*

Standing there in the cold and snow, Callie was rigid with no expression on her face. Looking at her, one would think she didn't care or that she had no sadness, yet underneath it all stood a broken girl masked by the reality that she would never see her Grandpa Frank again.

After her father had left them, her grandfather had sort of stepped in as a major role in her life. She had adored her daddy and the devastation of it all left her in disarray. She couldn't understand how someone who loved her could just be gone. At first, the small child had no need for any male figure in her life. She'd cling to her mother but most of all to the small stuffed horse her daddy had given her. And even though she was just 3 years old, she still remembered...she remembered everything clearly. Her daddy's green eyes, his deep voice that made her giggle, his scruffy beard that tickled her face, the way he'd play his guitar and sing her bed time lullaby's.

Then one day when she was 5 years old, her Grandpa Frank had to stay home and watch her as her mother was going on a trip to see about this cattle horse that was afraid of water. She'd be gone overnight and Callie was just starting kindergarten. Needless to say, by the time Stef returned, Callie had a new best friend. Her Grandpa Frank had reached out and stole the little girls heart, and most of all, he taught her to ride.

"Cals, we need to go, my love. People will be heading to the house for dinner," her mother slid her hand over her daughters stone-cold face, tipping her chin. "I promise to bring you back tomorrow, sweetheart, yes?"

That's when a glimmer of a tear formed in the teens eyes but quickly disappeared as she nodded her response. "Ok."

Sliding her hand into her daughter's, the pair walked in silence through the dusting of snow on the hard earth beneath their cowboy boots. The wind was beginning to pick up, yet Callie didn't seem to notice for she had been ice cold since last week when Frank had toppled over in the barn. She didn't think she would ever be warm again even if the summer heat came. She just knew that life would remain frozen in place as she couldn't imagine a life without her best friend.

FLASHBACK ENDS*

STEF*

"Thank you, Mike. I will let you know if I hear anything, ok?" I sit in the kitchen, frustrated beyond belief, my head leaning on my hand as I end the call with my cousin. After taking Lena's call earlier, I had excused myself from the meeting and driven home as fast as I possibly could. Something wasn't right, and I had an idea that Lena was blaming herself. But I wouldn't blame her or anyone, for that matter. If anything, I blame myself for not seeing she was miserable.

Running my hands through my short hair I hang up the phone and sigh deeply. "Love, I wish I knew what to say. Maybe I should've moved out to the guest house again as soon as I got my cast off. Moved slower with you..." I look up into Lena's sad eyes as she says all of this to me.

"No. Don't go there. I'm her mother and should've seen signs. But how could I have known? She looked me in the eyes, Lena, and lied to me!" My voice cracks as I quickly brush a tear away.

"I don't know what to say..." Lena looks lost and I'm sure I look no better as I pull her in my arms and we cling to each other. My body shakes as she tries to comfort me with her gentle hands. "Shhhhhh, love...I'm here. I promise I'm not leaving you."

"Just hold me," I whisper shakily. I'm falling apart especially after finding the note I found on Callie's dresser when I searched her room. Those words are haunting me even now as we sit here and wait for the police to arrive to come up with some kind of plan on what we should do next.

I feel Lena pull back and wipe my tears with her soft fingers. "Baby, I'm not leaving. We'll find your baby together." Her eyes search mine hoping to find reassurance I don't blame her. I nod as I wipe my own eyes and stand. Pulling the letter out of my back pocket, I hand it to her.

"You should read this. You won't think I blame you anymore. Callie's issues ran deeper than me and you," my voice cracks again as I head towards the door. "I'm gonna go start the nightly routine while we wait for Officer Tompkins. Try to relax, ok? I...I have to keep myself busy..." she nods as she also stands and walks quickly towards me.

"My love," that's all she says as she cups my cheeks and softly brushes her lips over mine, and for one split second all is right in my world. When she pulls back and I leave, the deep ache returns breaking my heart in two.

LENA*

As soon as Stef leaves the house, I sink back onto the kitchen chair where I was currently sitting. Sighing, I open the letter Callie had written the night before. My mind didn't understand why she would leave but leave a note behind. Does she wish to be found? Does she think for one second Stef wouldn't come looking for her? Even I saw the devotion Stef had for her daughter, and I saw the extreme protectiveness Callie had for her mother.

Taking a deep breath, I open the letter and begin to read:

Dear Mom,

Ever since Grandpa Frank left us, there has been this giant hole in my soul. I knew you were grieving and I didn't want to burden you with my own sadness. But I never forgot my daddy. I always wanted to know why he left me. Why was it so easy for him to walk away from me, his only daughter? I know you didn't love him like you love Lena. I remember how you would fight with Daddy and how you look at Lena. You do belong together. I just don't want her to take Daddy's place. Grandpa Frank took his place kind of and now he's dead. You look too happy, and it seems everyone who ever was there for me, dies or leaves. So, Lena can replace me, and you two can be happy together. I will always love you, Mom.

Your Girl,

Cals

Tears are streaming down my face now, and I can hardly breathe, I'm crying so hard. This girl is in pain and has been for years. She's so young still to completely understand she isn't the reason for these life happenings. My heart is breaking into pieces as I realize my tears are running over the words; so, I quickly fold the letter and put it back in the envelope before it's not legible anymore.

I stand as I quickly dry my tears and grab my hat before running to the barn to help Stef. I would be here for her and show her how much I have grown to love not only her but also her baby girl. I also have an idea where Callie may have gone. Something in that letter struck a chore with me, and made realize, her issues ran all the way back to when her father left. Callie was in search of her dad, Russell Carver.


	19. Chapter 19

STEF*

"Why do you think that?" I snap as I stop mucking Copper's stall. Lena had just told me where she thinks Callie may have run.

The curly haired woman looks sincere and sure of herself. I wipe my forehead with the back of my gloved hand as I blow a stray piece of hair out of my face. "Look right here in her letter to you," she unfolds the worn page and points to the sentence that states, 'I always wanted to know why he left me.'

I sigh as I clear my throat and set the pitch fork against the wall of the stall. I stare at the letter for a bit before folding it and handing it back to her. "I told her why he left. She stopped questioning it way back when she was younger. I just don't understand." Furrowing my brow, I continue mucking the stall.

Lena stares at me for a bit before she shoves the letter back into her back pocket and rolls up her sleeves. "Just think about it, Stef. This could be a major clue. I don't know why, but it's bothering me. When you began to tell me pieces of your story in the beginning, I began to understand why Callie didn't care for me. I mean, I don't want to really go down that road right now, but maybe we should find where Russell may be living? That may lead us to where Cals is headed?"

My heart races as I listen to Lena. I know she means well, but I feel like possibly Callie is playing wolf and may not be too far from the ranch. She is my daughter after all, but by now, my head is pounding and all I want to do is have found her by now. I sigh loudly again, and Lena finally concedes, "Which stalls haven't you mucked yet?"

"I still have Dusty and Marlin's to do, then I need to feed them all and check their water." I don't even look at her as I continue the tedious task at hand. As long as I keep my body busy, and as long as it's hard, back breaking work, I can try to still my mind the best I can. I hear her telling me she'll take over mucking the other two stalls as the stall door closes, and I stop for a moment, leaning against the wooden wall. Tears well up in my eyes as my stomach twists and turns. Who am I kidding? Physical labor isn't helping at this point!

FLASHBACK*

Dear Stef and Callie-baby,

I hate to leave on this note, but I just couldn't look you both in the eye. I couldn't because I'm such a coward. I am not one to run, but Frank has been riding my ass to marry you, Stef. And I know you just don't love me like that. I can see it in your eyes. I see how you look at Emily every time she comes out for her riding lesson, and I have to say it makes me sad, yet I truly want you to be happy. You won't be happy as long as I'm here trying to be in your life. Maybe we were meant to bring our beautiful Callie-baby into this world, but we were never meant to be together. I don't regret you, Callie, lovebug. And when you're old enough to understand, your mother will tell you that.

I've been offered a tour along the west coast, and Stef, you know that's my biggest dream, one which I simply cannot pass up for anything. So, I'm leaving. Don't try to find me and make me come back. I need you to break yourself clean of me and search your heart. You know who you are even if you can't seem to find it within yourself to admit it. You have always been sure of who you are, and I love you for that side of you. You will be ok. Our Callie-baby will be okay. When she's old enough, tell her she can find me if she wishes. I'll never not want to be apart of her life. But it's all up to her.

I will ALWAYS love you, Stefanie Foster and I will never stop loving you, Callie-baby

All my love,

Russ

Stef found the letter by the coffeepot the following morning and had bawled it up and thrown it across the room. "Fucking son of a bitch!!!!"

"Mommy, what's wrong?" little Callie came running out of the room, her messy hair around her little face.

Kneeling down in front of her baby, Stef cupped her cheeks, "Who wants Mickey Mouse pancakes with chocolate chips?"

"MEEEEEEE!!!!!" Callie clapped as she jumped up and down. Stef didn't have the heart to tell Callie yet, and she didn't know how she was going to.

"What's this, Mommy?" Callie held up the crumpled letter.

"Oh, that," Stef laughed as she grabbed it quickly. "It's nothing, my baby. Now get out your big girl helping stool so we can get started, yes?"

Giggling, Callie did as she was asked and soon pancakes and bacon were on the table. Stef had no appetite, but she put on a brave face as she sipped her coffee and watched her little one devour her favorite breakfast.

Later on that day, Stef had decided to confront her father. "Did you tell Russ he had to marry me?" She found him in the barn oiling one of the saddles.

Looking at his daughter, Frank Foster frowned, "Don't you think it's high time he made an honest woman out of you, Stef?"

"Answer the question! DID YOU TELL RUSS HE HAD TO MARRY ME?" Stef's face was red with anger as she stepped closer to her father.

"Keep your voice down! You'll scare the horses!" Frank yet again evaded the question.

"That's just great, Dad! Great! Because now he's gone! What am I gonna tell Callie, huh? WHAT?" Her voice broke as she quickly brushed the tears she refused to cry.

Jumping off his workbench, Frank was now shouting, "WHAT DO YOU MEAN, HE'S GONE?"

"As in skipped town, adios, sayonara, see you never! What else do you think I meant?" Both daughter and father were now standing their ground, red faced and arms folded as if they were twins.

"Son of a bitch! What the hell, Russell! Where did he say he was going?"

"Why do you fucking care? Huh? My baby's dad is gone!" Stef threw her hands up now laughing, her anger white hot. Turning away, she began to leave the barn but turned around to face the man again. "You know what's kind of funny about all of this?" She kept chuckling through her question.

"I don't find anything remotely funny about it," Frank was scowling hard.

"Of course you don't, Dad. It's your way or else with you. Russ told me he knows I'm gay! I'm gay! I like girls! And he told me to break free of him and find myself! But if course, deep down you knew that about me!" Laughing hysterically now, the woman left the barn and a stunned Frank Foster who was now frozen in place.

FLASHBACK ENDS*

Remembering that pivotal day, I now sigh as I finish the stall and head to find Lena. Rounding the corner of the barn, I smack into her, hose in hand. "Oh shit! I'm so sorry!" I grab both of her arms as she tumbles into me.

"What's wrong, Sref?" She asks as she regains her composure and looks me in the eyes.

"I can't do this, Lena...I just can't go digging up the past again! It was buried!" I feel her strong arms wrapping tightly around me as she comforts me.

"Shhhhhh, my love, I'm right here. I told you I'm not going anywhere," she croons softly as I soon realize I'm sobbing uncontrollably. Years of pent up sadness, hurt and anger come tumbling out of me as I shake in her arms. "My sweet, sweet love, I got you," I hear her through my loud sobs, and I feel her pulling me to the ground so she can hold me in her arms. This is where I finally feel safe, and this is where I belong. Yet I won't feel whole completely until my baby is safe in my arms.


	20. Chapter 20

CALLIE*

Since the day I found out Jarrod got his rodeo card, I began to beg him to teach me how to do the "team rodeo" event. After I just about mastered it, I made sure he knew he couldn't do it without me, and then told him that if I went with him, my father would meet us, and we would be able to stay with him. Of course, none of this was true, and Jarrod never even thought to talk to Stef about it all. Maybe he wasn't the brightest boy after all, but he liked me and he would be my ticket to Russell.

"Hey, Cals, wake up! We're here," I groan as I open my eyes and realize the truck has stopped. It's now daylight as we had been driving all night.

"Where are we?" I mutter as I yawn and rub my eyes.

"We're just outside of Beaver Falls, where my first rodeo starts tonight. What time did you say your Dad was meeting you?"

I sigh as I open my phone. I had found Russell after months of digging, and found that he would, in fact be nearby. In fact, his group was scheduled to play a concert nearby, and I had every plan of meeting him. Of course, all this time, he thought I was Stef, as I had pretended to be my mother through the emails we sent back and forth.

FLASHBACK*

Finding the little green box I knew my mother hid under her bed, I began to dig through it's contents. I knew she put things in this box that she wanted to remember or treasure, and as I emptied its contents, I found letter after letter addressed to me and her.

My heart thudded in my chest, and I felt as if I couldn't breathe as I read letter after letter from my father. He told me of his ventures and always, always said he loved me at the end of them. I felt betrayed and stabbed in the back from my mother who said he didn't want anything to do with me, and when she returned from her town meeting that night, I met her at the door.

"You mind telling me why you hid these from me all these years?" I held up the stack of letters as my mother entered the house.

"Why are you digging in my green box, Cals?" She replied as she shut the door and set down her keys.

"Why, mother? You made me think he didn't love me! Why won't you tell me why he left?????" I shout at her as I watch her face grow tense and her jaw tighten. I had my mothers temper, and if we fought, it wasn't pretty.

"You need to keep your voice down, young lady! First of all, sit down so we can have a decent discussion! This isn't how we solve things in this household!" She walked towards me, and I stood still, refusing to move. "Sit!" Her voice boomed making me jump a little.

"Fine!" I plopped myself down and slammed the stack of letters down on the table as I waited to hear what she had to say on the subject. I wanted to believe her. I did. But every fiber in me wanted to say that everything that came out of her mouth was a big fat lie.

"I didn't lie to you. Your father chose a career he always dreamed about over you and me. I should've given you those letters. I'm sorry. I guess I wanted to protect you from further pain and the longing and wishing he'd just visit one time. He never came back. I wrote him once, and we set up a time for him to come and see you. He never showed. That's when I knew I needed to protect my baby girl..." her eyes filled with tears as she reached across the table for my hand.

Tears had sprung to my eyes as well, and I quickly wiped them away. "You still should've given them to me. He says he loves me at the end of every letter, Mom..." I bury my face in my hands now as I feel her pulling me into her lap.

"My sweet girl...I made a mistake. I should've given them to you...will you forgive me? Hmmm?" She hugged me close and I cried in her neck as I wrapped my arms around her. Deep inside I knew she really did want to protect me from the pain of it all, but I still needed to know why. Why did he leave? And why make plans to see us and not show up? As I clung to my mother, I vowed to myself I'd find him and get my answers. No matter the cost.

FLASHBACK ENDS*

I knew what I was doing wasn't right as Stef had taught me that telling the truth was at the top of the list of being a good, loyal person. And I had broken that rule so many times these past few weeks that I didn't even know who I was anymore.

"Ummm, I'm still waiting to hear from him. But it's kinda early to be contacting him, don't you think?" I laugh nervously as I see all of the missed calls from both Stef and Lena. A text had even come thru every hour, and I had erased every single one of them. No way was I going back there. Not when I needed to face my father.

"Okay, well, let's get some sleep then we can grab breakfast. Deal?"

I look over at him and sigh. "I need to use the restroom. Maybe we can find a hotel?" I knew there was only one hotel in this little town, and Russell might even be there since he's in town. Why not go and try to find which room he's in while I'm at it.

"Oh, ughhhh, sure? I think I saw one when I was driving into town." He turns his truck back on and backs up heading back into town.

My stomach knots as we bump along the road and finally pull up to the rinky dink little hotel in the center of town. I get out of the truck as fast as I can, and just as I open the door, I bump into a man who was on his way out. "Oh, I'm sorry!" I say as my heart thuds.

"Watch where you're going!" He grumbles as he spills his coffee.

My face turns red as my temper flares; then as I turn to look him in the eyes, I see a familiar set of green eyes and sandy brown hair. I swallow as I feel the air being sucked right out of my lungs. He looks older...no, it can't be. This is too good to be true. This can't be this easy...I stutter and try to speak as he stares at me in confusion.

"Are you alright, little girl?" He asks as he pulls out a napkin and wipes his coffee cup down and hand where he spilled the coffee.

I blink several times as I feel the blood rush out of my face. "Russell?" I finally speak as he looks even more confused.

"Do I know you?" He walks closer as he looks me in the eyes.

"I'm your daughter. I'm Callie Foster."


	21. Chapter 21

STEF*

"I can't believe you don't think anythings happened to her, Sheriff! She's been missing now for over 24 hours!" My face is red and my fists clenched as I stand face to face with Charlie Tompkins, the towns sheriff. I haven't slept in way over 24 hours nor have I eaten, and he's telling me things I don't want to hear.

"She clearly left you a note stating she was leaving and for you not to worry; so, she's not been kidnapped. We have reason to believe she may be around here somewhere," he is trying to remain calm but I'm not letting him off that easily.

"Ya, well what if this was your daughter! You'd have search parties out, that's what! I don't understand your mindset right now! Just get off my property! I'll find her myself!!!!!" I shout as I snatch my cowboy hat and keys off the table.

"Love, baby, stop!" I hear Lena calling to me as she comes into the room and sees me leaving. "Excuse me, Charlie. I'll talk to her."

He nods as he sits and makes a few phone calls, but I haven't listened to Lena nor would I. Callie is a missing person, and he doesn't want to help. I will find my own baby and do it alone!

"Wait! Stef! Stop!" Lena reaches me as I'm halfway to the barn. She grabs my arm. "Love, relax. He's just doing his job. Babe, please!" She pleads softly as my blood pressure is now through the roof.

I yank out of her grasp. "No, I will NOT listen! She could be halfway across the country now, and she's a fucking minor!!!!! All alone!!!!" My voice cracks as Lena tries to calm me yet again.

"Baby, please! You aren't doing yourself any favors right now getting so daggone angry!" She tries to rub my arm again to calm me, but I remain firm.

"I have to do this, ok? I have to find her." I turn around and head towards my office in the barn, and she follows close behind. If Callie is looking for Russell, my best bet would be to look at the tour schedule he recently sent me.

"Do you have any idea where to start looking, love? Where would Russell be?" She follows me into my office but keeps a safe distance from me knowing how heated I really am.

I actually begin to calm some as I search my desk for his recent letter. I have some sort of clue how to figure this out as I take everything out of the envelope and look up at her. "I'll find out where his next few nights of his tour are and drive. That will be my plan. I'll drive until I find my baby."

I sigh as I pull out my phone and text Callie yet again.

Sweets, tell me you're safe. That's all I want to know is that you're safe and ok...please, honey. I love you.

I sniffle as I push send, and start writing down some addresses. Lena finally stands, "I will go pack some food, and water and clothes. I'm coming with you, babe. You can't do this alone." She stands and waits for my reply, but I have begun to shut down as I just grunt and nod.

She sighs softly as she quietly leaves to do as she said, and I continue writing out my plan as well as addresses, phone numbers and even highways. I will find my baby if it's the last thing I do.

LENA*

I have known that Stef is a very passionate person, but at this point, she seems unreasonable. I don't want her going out there alone, and it's not that I don't trust her. I do. I trust her with my life, but this is her baby, and I know a mother bear looking for cub can be dangerous as well as put herself in a position to get hurt if it means saving that cub.

As I pack us both a bag of clothes and toiletries, for I don't know how long we'll be gone, I try a feeble attempt to text Callie as well. Both Stef and I have tried to call her numerous times, and I know that Stef had texted her every hour if not every half hour or even fifteen minutes. Callie was smart though, and she had somehow shut off the location on her phone and her mother's so we couldn't track her. This had enraged Stef even more, and I tried to reason with her that her daughter was just as determined of a human as she was. And possibly Stef needed to try and think of what she would do in this situation so as to figure out where Callie may be.

"Are you ready to go, Lena?" Stef walks in the room, and she looks completely exhausted. I know she hasn't slept.

"I know you don't want to hear this, but please let me drive for a bit so you can sleep?" I zip up her bag and grab both of her hands. Her eyes are so sad, and I truly hate seeing her like this. I wish somehow I could take this pain away.

"Ok," she surprises me as she gives me a weak smile. I pull her to me and hug her close, kissing the side of her neck.

"I was just about to text her again. We'll find her, baby, ok?" I pull back and run my hand down her face. She links back tears and nods dejectedly.

I squeeze her hand and we pick up the packed bags and head to the kitchen. I pull out a cooler and pack snacks and water before we head out to her truck. The sheriff had already left, promising to start a search party as soon as possible. He promised to keep in touch with us, and Stef was relieved that he had come to his senses.

As we jump in the truck, Stef outlines her plan to me. "I found out that Russ will be playing with his band tonight in Beaver Falls then he's headed towards Smoky River where they're having an outdoor concert camp type thing for two days. My guess is that maybe we can catch him there."

"Do you think Callie has his tour schedule and is headed that way?" I look over at her determined face.

"I think she does. She must have been god awful determined. I'm just worried about her traveling alone," she sounds even more tired as she says this.

I grab her hand and lean over, kissing her cheek as I whisper, "We have to trust, sweetheart. I know it's hard." I feel her response as she runs her hand softly down my cheek.

As we head out on the road, the sun is setting. I am determined to drive as far as I can allowing Stef to sleep and gather her strength. I turn the radio on low as I hear Stef leaving another voicemail.

Baby girl, it's mama. I know you don't understand this now, but you will one day. Just tell me you're safe and ok. Please, baby girl. Text me even...let me know nothing is wrong. I love you, sweetheart with all of my heart...

Her voice cracks as she quickly hangs up, and I reach over to hold her hand as we sit in silence, the radio playing softly in the background. We are both out of words at this point, but each other's presence is enough.


	22. Chapter 22

CALLIE*

"Callie?" the man asks incredulously as he stares right back at me. My face is red now, and I nervously look at my phone then back at him.

"That's my name, and you're Russell, yes? My father?"

His face goes ashen as I say this and he swallows. "How do you...even, remember me?"

Jarrod must have thought I was taking too long because I soon hear him running up behind me. "Oh, there you are, Cals! I was wondering what was taking so long!" He sees the man and smiles as he extends his hand, "I'm Jarrod, Callie's boyfriend."

Russ shakes his hand as he looks more and more confused at this current situation. "Where's Stef? Where's your mom?"

I swallow as I keep up the guise I've been using. "She is at home, remember? She sent you an email saying I was coming to meet you here tonight? I'm just a...tad earlier than planned." I laugh nervously as I seem to be the only one having a hard time believing my story. Both Jarrod and Russ have bought it hook, line and sinker.

Understanding washes over Russell's face, "Yes, she did tell me that in her last email. Ummm, would you like to come up to my room? Wash up? I have an adjoining room to mine you can use...ughhh, until I leave in the morning. You were coming with me, right?"

"Of course!" I beam as I look at Jarrod who knowingly just nods and offers to grab my bags. I follow Russ back into the hotel, and we head up to the rooms. I'm as nervous as hell right now, but I do have an awful lot on my mind.

"Here we are. The adjoining room is through here," he opens the door, and Jarrod brings in my luggage. It's already been settled that Jarrod would be staying down at the rodeo with some friends; so, I don't give it a second thought as he hugs me then leaves to head out, promising to pick me up in a couple of hours to practice and get ready.

"Ughhh, this is really weird for me," Russ finally breaks the silence after Jarrod leaves. I look at this man in front of me, and it seems surreal. Of course, I have pieces of memories of him when I was younger, but some of those pieces feel like they've just been told to me and they aren't mine. I do remember being very sad when he left suddenly, and now comes the questions all over again.

"Ya, same here, but..." I swallow hard as I scuff my boot on the carpet and play with my cowboy hat. "I do have several questions I hope you'll answer for me." I clear my throat as I finally look up to meet his eyes.

He looks at me sheepishly kind of like he's all of the sudden a bit shy and is fighting it. "Anything, Callie, but first I should get you some breakfast. Do you want to clean up and meet me downstairs?"

"Sure. I can do that," I smile awkwardly yet again and quickly close the door behind him when he leaves. I sink onto the bed and shiver slightly. It's not really cold, but my nerves are beginning to show as everything I've been dreaming about is finally coming true. Maybe I'll get my answers. But what if the answers I've been looking for aren't what I want to hear? Will I panic and beg Jarrod to take me home? I can't go back there right now. As it is, my mom is really worried per the hundreds of texts and phone calls she's already made. I can't face her right now. I'm both mad and hurt by everything that has happened. Why did Grandpa Frank have to die? He probably would have helped me find my dad. Why didn't I ever think to ask him before now? There are so many why's and not enough answers.

As I quickly undress and shower, my mind doesn't seem to calm down, but my resolve stays the same. Hopefully before I head on to the rodeo later today, I'll have what I'm looking for...what my heart has been searching for all of these years.

"Do you like pancakes or eggs?" my dad asks as we sit across from each other at this old country diner. I feel a little bit better having showered and changed, and now I'm starving.

"Both actually," I stop myself short of telling him that mom loves pancakes, and that's why we eat more of those. I don't really want to mention mom anymore than I really have to at the moment.

"Then order both! My treat! Don't go thinking that just because you travelled here alone that you have to pay for anything. I've wanted to pay for things for so long..." he stops himself as our waitress arrives, and she takes our orders. He doesn't correct me when I order coffee, and I smile to myself knowing my mom would not be happy about this.

"So, ask me anything, Callie. I'm an open book. I've dreamed of this day for a very long time actually, and when your mom started emailing me a couple of weeks ago, it seemed too good to be true," he leans back in his booth seat and watches me.

I try to relax as I smile softly at him. "I don't know where to start, honestly. I have so many unanswered questions."

"But surely you've asked your mother, and she's answered them?"

I didn't want to mention her to him anymore than I had to, but I suppose she's kind of pertinent to this journey of mine. I shake my head, "No, she didn't and she really wouldn't. Every time I mentioned you or asked a question, she'd tell me the same exact thing."

I pause for a moment, and he frowns, "And what's that exactly?"

I look in his eyes and continue, "She says that you left to follow your musical dream of being in a band. That that was more important to you than a family. But then, just about a month ago, I found all of the letters and cards you have sent over the years for holidays and my birthdays, and I confronted her."

I stop while the waitress places our coffee mugs on the table then fills them. When she leaves, Russ grabs the sugar then hands it to me. "That couldn't have been too fun...confronting her, that is. I remember how hard head she was, and she's probably the same." He laughs as he stirs his coffee, and I do the same.

"We argued. She said you two had set up a meeting a couple of months after you left, and you two were gonna figure out how you'd still get to see me...then you never showed." I say the last part in a bitter tone because since I heard that story, it felt like the knife of him leaving dug a little deeper.

He freezes as he swallows his coffee and quickly sets down his mug. "That's not true."

"What?" I think that I'm hearing things now.

"That's not true, Callie. I did show up. I was early in fact." He now looks uneasy and as if he really doesn't want to tell me this part of the story.

We both are quiet for some time, and I finally break the silence. "Just tell the truth, Russell," I say this with a snippiness in my voice as I can feel my heart begin to race in my chest and my cheeks begin to turn pink.

"I am telling the truth, Callie. I promise on my mama's grave, I am!"

I bite my lower lip to hold back the tears that are already starting to rush into my eyes and throat. I can't speak because if I do, I'll explode or cry hysterically, but I finally find a way to say my heart. "So, this is how it's gonna be? You and mom continually only telling me bits and pieces of the story leaving me in the dark to figure out where the puzzle pieces go?"

He reaches across the table and tries to brush my hand, but I pull away. "Please, Callie, it's not like that! Just listen. Please!" he begins to beg.

I'm shaking now, and my mind is spinning. "Tell me the truth..." I manage in a choked voice as I feel my legs begin to tremble beneath the table.

"I came down early the day before kind of as a surprise only to find Stef and you gone into town. Your grandfather didn't like me very much as it was, and when he saw me, he threatened me. Said that if I set foot on his property again, he'd shoot me. Said I didn't honor my word and make your mother an honorable woman. Told me I was good for nothing, and that he better not find out I tried to contact you or Stef again. He held me at gunpoint, Callie. I had no choice but to get back in my truck and leave completely heartbroken."

Everything he's telling me makes no sense whatsoever to my young mind. Why did my mom keep me from him too? Did my mom and grandpa have a vendetta against this man? But I find myself shaking my head adamantly as he tells me all of this, and soon, I'm interrupting him. "No..."

"I'm telling the truth, Callie. I should have been a man and stood up to him, but your Grandpa Frank was a scary man."

I jump up and slam my hand on the table, " I said no! Grandpa Frank would never threaten somebody unless they meant his family harm!"

My whole body is shaking as I dig in my small wallet to pull out cash. "Callie, wait, I'm telling the truth!"

"Stop! You're lying! You're a liar! I don't believe you!" I manage to pull out a ten dollar bill and throw it on the table before fleeing the diner. I call Jarrod as fast as I can and duck around the corner so my dad can't see me. I have to get to the rodeo and figure out what to do next. My mom was right. I can't trust anything my father says. Why didn't I listen to begin with?


	23. Chapter 23

STEF*

As I open my eyes, I realize the sun is beginning to rise over the horizon which means one thing: Lena drove the entire night. My body is stiff as is my neck as I shift in my seat and rub my eyes.

"Morning, sleepy head," Lena reaches for my hand and links our fingers.

"Morning...where are we?" I put my visor down as the sun is beginning to brighten my view.

The truck glides off the interstate and into a rest stop as Lena unbuckles her seatbelt. "We are stopping for breakfast!" She leans across the seat and nuzzles my neck. I close my eyes as I try to swallow down the rush of anxiety that begins to flood me all over again. Callie. My baby is missing still. It doesn't matter that she took off on her own accord. She's still missing in my book.

"Uhhhh, let me make a phone call really quick, ok?" I reach for my phone between the seats, and Lena stops me.

"Babe, please. She's not going to answer. Today, we'll find her. I have a good feeling. Let's just get cleaned up and get you some coffee." Her warm, brown eyes search my sad ones and I sigh dejectedly as I nod.

As we settle down with warm mugs of coffee, I look out the window as I become lost in thought. Possibly I've been going about this all wrong. Why haven't I simply tried to track down Russ myself and call him? Obviously, all signs point to him and Callie's need to find him and get her answers. I know she's only been gone for a little over 24 hours, but what concerns me is how is she traveling and is she safe?

"Babe?" I feel Lena's hand on mine and realize the waitress has come back to take our orders. I'm not hungry at all, but I know I should eat something.

"Uhhh, sorry about that. I'll take two slices of rye, double toasted with butter," I smile as I close the menu, and she waitress leaves.

"What's on your mind, my love?" Lena has been so understanding, and I blink back tears as I realize just how much she's been a rock for me lately.

"I need to find Russ' number, and try to get ahold of him. If what you say is true, wouldn't it be good to..to try and talk to him and see if he's heard from her?"

"I think that's a great idea, babe. Frankly, I was thinking the same thing last night as I was driving, and when we stopped for gas, I checked to see where his hotel was and called to see if he had checked in. I just missed him and his band leaving, but I think we can try to see if we can find the manager or director of this camp thing he's headed next? Try to track him down?"

My toast arrives, and I manage to swallow a few bites before searching on my phone for some phone numbers. After several failed attempts, I finally got somewhere.

"Really? Ok, yes, tell him that Stef Foster is calling and please, give him my number. I need to speak to him as soon as possible. Thank you so much." I hang up and sigh. "His band just checked in; so, I'm hoping he calls me soon."

"That's good news, love!" Lena, always so optimistic.

I smile faintly and her as my voice cracks again. "It's getting harder to breathe...I don't know what I'll do if something happens..."

"Stop. Don't go there." She gets up and comes around the table to sit next to me. "You can't go there, Stefanie Marie. We need to have some faith. It's going to work out, and we'll have our baby back soon. I promise!" I bury my face in her neck and cry for what seems to be the hundredth time already. I've never allowed anyone to see this side of me, but I'm exhausted, hungry, and emotional but most of all, scared to death.

CALLIE*

After fleeing the hotel, I focused on getting ready for my part with Jarrod in the rodeo that night. I saw my dad perform with his band, and with a heavy heart, I avoided having to run into him at all costs. I wanted to believe that my grandfather didn't keep him from me, from us. But deep down, I everything is beginning to make sense. Why he never showed up that day to meet my mom...why my mom was only trying to protect me from further hurt thinking that my dad was just a deadbeat dad...why she hid the letters from him and did the only thing she knew to do.

I also knew my mom never found a woman to be with when my grandfather was alive because of his bigoted ways. She never ever spoke to me about it except for once as one day, when I was 12, I saw her with Emily in the barn. She didn't know I was there, but I did. And I knew. I knew then that she never married my dad because of that, and I knew that she never had a steady girlfriend either...until Lena.

FLASHBACK*

"So, I was thinking that maybe you could, you know, stay...for..for dinner?" I overhear my mom talking to someone in the stable, and I sneak down the hallway and peak around the corner. It's Emily, the new vet tech, and she and my mom are standing pretty close.

She seems to be soaking in my mom's attention. "Ya? That would be nice, but I have to go! I'm supposed to be helping Avery tonight with the Peterson's mare who just went into labor. Rain check?"

My heart hammers in my chest as I wait for my mom's response, and my eyes bug out at what I see.

"Ok, a rain check," she runs her hand down Emily's arm and squeezes it. "Well, how about a picnic lunch sometime next week. You pick the day, and I'll make it happen."

Emily blushes slightly as she giggles like a school girl. "Ok, how about Wednesday. I'm off as long as there are no emergencies!"

My mom smiles and takes both of her hands as she rests her forehead on hers. "Yes, that would be nice..." she whispers, but I can still hear it. The next thing I know, my mom is kissing her! Kissing Emily on the mouth! And she likes it! I turn around and run back down the hallway and out the stable door and don't stop running until I reach the creek. Falling to my knees, I gasp for air. Oh shit! Why didn't she ever tell me?

That night I confront her, and she is embarrassed. "Are you sure that's what you saw, Callie?"

"I'm positive, Mom. Do you like girls now? Have you ALWAYS liked girls? What will Grandpa Frank say? You know how into church and God he is..."

"Callie, Callie, calm down. Please...please sit." She takes my hand and we sit on my bed. "You do know that I love you, right? Tell me you know."

I swallow hard and nod not understanding where she's going with this. "Yes, I do like...Emily, but I would never ever do anything to put you or your future in danger, yes? You know this..."

My heart hammers in my chest, and all I can do is nod again. "So, what now? Are you going to...date her?" I finally whisper.

"Oh, we're just having a picnic, Callie. It's a little complicated. Just...this is between us, ok?" She looks into my eyes and waits for my confirmation that I understand.

"Ok. Got it. I love you, Mom," I throw my hands around her and hug her tightly.

FLASHBACK ENDS*

Waking up the next day after thinking all of this through, I knew I had made a huge mistake, and I needed to fix it before I went back home. I find Jarrod over near his truck. "Hey, could you drive me somewhere?"


	24. Chapter 24

STEF*

"I can't believe that she pretended to be me all of this time! And this was all happening under my roof! I had no fucking clue!" I shout as we pull up to the campground.

"Love, it happens! Stop blaming yourself!" Lena tries so hard to calm me down, but by now, she knows that it's really hard to do so once I'm worked up.

I get out of the truck and slam the door as I walk over to the tree, shaking my head, and she's soon behind me. "And she's with some rodeo boy!!!! It must be Jarrod! The one I hired to help out when I was on the trail ride! Jesus fucking Christ! What am I going to do with her?" I begin pacing as I try to get service, holding my phone up in the air.

"Stef, calm down, love, please, I'm begging you," Lena attempts to rub my back.

"No! I will NOT calm down, Lena! She ran off with a boy, a boy who is 18, might I add. She pretended to be me in emails to Russell, and she took off again! Tell me which part I should be remotely calm about!!!!!!" My face is red, and my blood pressure through the roof, but I don't care anymore. I'm running on adrenaline and anger at this point. I don't care that people are beginning to look my direction either. The sun is high in the sky now, and the humidity is out of this world causing even more irritation in me.

"The part where you know she's not alone and at least she was seen by Russell last night at that rodeo. That's the part that should make you stop and thank the stars she's ok and safe," Lena points out to me as I snap at her.

I sigh loudly as what she says registers with me, and I grab her hand. "I'm sorry, Lena. I shouldn't be taking this out on you. You're right...but she's who knows where by now? That's what worries me. We're back to fucking square one again!" Running my hands through my short hair, I jump as my phone rings.

"Stef, it's Russ. I do happen to have a number for the Jarrod kid. I called the rodeo and told them he was with a minor, and they gladly gave me his cell number. Are you parked yet?"

"Yes, I am. Where do you want to meet?"

"You see the huge tent towards the middle of the campgrounds? It's yellow and blue. You can't miss it. Meet me there."

"Sounds good, Russ."

Lena looks at me as I hang up. "So?"

"Let's go. He's meeting us at that big tent over there," I take her hand and link our fingers as we hurry that direction. My heart races as I am hoping we are now closing in on my daughter. She will regret the day she scared the crap out of me. I am at my whits end by now, and I'm done with this nonsense.

LENA*

I have been trying to be understanding of Stef throughout this whole process, and if I'm completely honest with myself, I'm beyond exhausted. I've been doing all of the driving just so she will simmer down and rest, but it's only proven to give her more strength to go on a rampage. I haven't slept in over 24 hours, and I'm beginning to feel it especially now that the coffee is wearing off. As I sit over on a chair and wait for Stef to get done with her phone call, Russ walks over to me.

"I should introduce myself. I'm Callie's father, Russ." He extends his hand, and I shake it and smile.

"I finally get to meet the infamous Russell," I laugh as he looks at me somewhat puzzled. "What I mean is, I heard a lot about you from Stef."

He looks at me even more awkwardly. "I mean, she was explaining why she had a daughter, and how you always knew she wasn't really into you, of course. I hope no hard feelings." Damn it! My mouth is running away with me! I can feel the heat rising in my cheeks as Stef quickly hangs up and walks towards us.

"So, I talked to Jarrod, and he said they're about an hour away. I asked him not to tell Callie we are here, and to play it cool. He had no earthly clue that me or Russ didn't know she was with him." She sighs as she run her hands frustratingly again through her frazzled hair.

"That's bull hockey, Stef! Do you believe him? I used to be a teenage boy! He just wanted her!" Russ is really protective, I notice as his fist tightens.

"Let's just take a beat and be thankful that they are an hour away, and that Callie is safe," I say in a loud enough voice to get both of their attention. "Ok? She's safe! You'll have her back with you soon, my love." I walk over and wrap my arms around Stef as she just nods and hugs me back.

I can feel her body shaking, and I know she's crying quietly. There is going to have to be some family discussion when we get Callie back. Some things need to be brought out in the open, and communication needs to start flowing. Too many misunderstandings and secrets are what brought them here, and I'm beyond exhausted just thinking about it.

CALLIE*

As we near Smokey River, my heart begins to race as I rehearse in my head what I'm going to say to my dad. I do feel badly I didn't believe him, for I loved my Grandpa Frank very much. But we always ignored his bigoted ways, and never really discussed it because maybe we didn't want waves.

Tears burn my eyes because I just wanted to talk to him one more time. Ask him why he chased my dad away. Ask him why he couldn't just accept my mom no matter what. Ask him what's wrong with loving people where they are. I know I have made many mistakes over the past few weeks, but maybe when I get back home, my mom will be forgiving.

"Almost there, Cals. We'll probably stay the night. I'm exhausted," Jarrod says as he turns down a dirt road into the gigantic campground.

I yawn and stretch as we park, and when I get out of the truck, Jarrod seems a little off. "Uhhhhh, lets go check in at the main tent..."

I look at him funny. "You ok? You seem...nervous?" I laugh awkwardly as I take his hand.

"Ya, I'm good," he squeezes my hand, and as we near the tent, I see my dad.

My heart begins to race as I near him, and as I reach him, I let go of Jarrod's hand. "Russell?" I laugh shakily.

He just looks at me; then after a while, he removes his hat, "Callie...I don't know where to start. I know everything."

I feel sick to my stomach as my face drops. "What do...you mean by...everything," I whisper barely audible now.

But he doesn't answer me. A familiar voice does. A voice I would know anywhere. "We put two and two together, Cals. You have an awful lot of explaining to do, young lady..." I look up into the familiar intense hazel eyes of none other than Stefanie Foster, and I gasp. It's my mother, and I know she won't go easy on me. I look over and see Lena beside her, her arms folded. Dear God, please let the earth swallow me up right now...


	25. Chapter 25

Callie couldn't believe her eyes as she looked stood there looking into familiar hazel ones as well as brown ones along with her father's green. How was this possible? She thought her plan was airtight, but then again, she kind of slipped up when she decided to run off from her father after he tried to give her the truth.

Any outsider looking in would see a stand still as Stef stood with her arms crossed, Lena, her thumb on the strap of her bag, Russ, hands in pockets, Jarrod, opposite of Lena, hat in hands, and then, Callie, fingers nervously playing at her side. Hard glares were being passed back and forth, and for a moment, you could cut the tension with a knife.

"YOU have a great deal of explaining to do, young lady, but first, thank you, Jarrod, for keeping my baby safe," Stef reverted her attention to the nervous boy twirling his hat in his hands.

"No problem, ma'am," he cleared his throats nervously as he met her intense stare. "I should've spoken to you first...it's my fault, ma'am. I...I wasn't thinking taking a minor on a trip without so much as...as speaking to her folks. I am sorry...ma'am.."

"Call me Stef. And yes, you SHOULD have spoken to me. You could get yourself in HUGE trouble with her being a minor! Do you get that? Hmmm? It's a good thing your father, Hiram, and me are such good friends..." she trailed off as she could clearly see Russ trying to hold back from saying something. Russ felt that Jarrod should be punished, but Stef did not. They were at an impasse on the subject, and honestly, she was just so thankful that Callie hadn't been alone.

"Are we going to just stand here or get on with it?" Callie asked with an attitude for she knew she was in deep water and that she would have hell to pay for taking off like she did.

"I'll take Jarrod on down to get something to eat," Russ looked towards the nervous boy, and he nodded knowing he pretty much didn't have a choice.

After Jarrod and Russ left, Lena turned to walk away, but Stef grabbed her hand. "Stay...please..."

The curly haired woman knew that Stef had a quick temper, and the very fact that she asked her to stay was proof that she wanted her with her while she spoke to her daughter. This warmed her heart so much because Lena was just beginning to feel like a major part of this little family. She only hoped with time, Callie would see it as well, and that she'd see just how much Lena had grown to love her.

The family walked away from the tent towards a grove of trees away from everyone, and Stef finally turned towards Callie as she licked her lips, her eyebrows furrowed. "Start from the beginning, and DO NOT tell me ONE SINGLE LIE. Is that understood?" Her voice was already raising, but Callie was just as quick tempered, making Lena wonder how this would play out.

The young girl rolled her eyes, "Relax, Mom. I have a head on my shoulders, and I was and am fine!"

"This isn't a good start, Callie! You better start talking and fast!" Lena reached out and gently placed her hand on Stef's arm which seemed to help as she took a deep breath even though her face was a crimson red.

"I had to get answers on my own, Mom! You never would come out and give me straight answers! You always tried to change the subject, and even when I confronted you about the letters I found, you wanted to blow it all off! As if that part of your life didn't matter! That my life didn't matter back then or now!"

"You know that's not true, Callie..."

"Stef..." Lena once again interjected as she knew Stef was ready to blow a gasket.

"What, Lena?" She snapped at Lena immediately. "What's she's saying is false! You are the absolute first love of my life, Callie! I wanted to protect you!"

"To the point of keeping me from my father? You know he told me Grandpa Frank threatened him?"

Stef looked at the girl wide eyed as she folded her arms. "He did no such thing..."

"That's what he told me! And something tells me he's right, Mom! Why is it you never pursued Emily?" The young girl was now crossing lines she knew was dangerous, but she needed to clear the air with all of the questions that have been swirling around in her head.

The blonde's face was an even deeper red now as Lena looked at her puzzled. "Emily?"

"Yes, Emily! The vet tech I caught you flirting with that one day," the young girl was remaining brave despite how nervous she really was.

"Now, you're chasing a rabbit that has NOTHING to do with why you thought it'd be ok to impersonate me to meet a total stranger and doing so with an 18 year old, who might I add, is still very immature!" The veins were sticking out on the side of her neck now as she moved closer to her daughter.

"It IS linked, Mom! All this time, YOU thought Russell didn't want to be a father still to me! You thought he stood me up, and yes, I was too young to remember, but the fact Grandpa Frank scared the hell out of him so he left us alone? And the fact you wouldn't date who you wanted?" Tears were now running down the teen's face as her voice began to shake. "HE did this! And all these years, I thought my dad didn't want me!"

She covered her face with her hands now as sobs shook her small frame, and Lena stepped in wrapping her arms around the girl and kissing the top of her head. "Shhhhhh, baby, shhhhhh..."

But Stef stood there, frozen, as the realization hit her like a freight train: she had always feared confrontation with her father, and what Callie was saying confirmed all that she had feared for years. Her face had gone white now as she ran her hands through her long blonde hair.

"I...Callie..." was all she could say as she turned away. "I need to think..." she muttered as she walked off leaving Lena to comfort a sobbing girl.

Lena's heart was breaking into a thousand pieces seeing both of her girls' heart shattered like this. Moving to cup Callie's cheeks so she could look at her. "I understand why you did this, but it was very irresponsible, honey." Leaning in to kiss the girl's forehead, she blinked back her own tears. "Your mom loves you so very much, and so do...so do I..."

Callie sniffled and wiped her tears as she looked back at Lena with a realization the woman her mother loved was being honest and true with her. "I...I love you, too...Mama.." she whimpered shakily to which the woman quickly pulled her to herself in the tightest hug ever.

"Oh, Callie..." she began to cry. They hugged for a while before Lena pulled back. "There will still be consequences, you hear me?"

The teen shook her head as she quickly resumed her hug. Maybe what she did wasn't right, but maybe now, both she and her mom could heal and move on.


	26. Chapter 26

"So, I was thinking that we should plan an overnight getaway, just you and me. What do you think?"

"Mmmm, are you asking ME out this time, Miss Emily Matthews?" My heart is now racing as I look into her soft brown eyes which have done nothing but melt my heart since the first day I laid my eyes on her. She had started coming out to the ranch about four months ago, and every single time she set one foot on the property, I found some reason to be in her presence.

Sliding her hand into mine, she gave me one of her earth shattering smiles. "Why do you get to do all of the woo'ing?" When I look shocked, she giggles, "Ya, you! I can pursue you, too, you know!"

It was then that I closed the distance between us and pulled her even closer. Not only was I becoming braver, but being out here away from everyone made it a heck of a lot easier. "Come here, you..." I whisper now as I brushed my fingers down her soft cheek.

"What if someone sees us? Are you afraid?" Her ragged breathing near my face was enough to drive me insane. This is all I've ever wanted. All I've ever dreamed of. Right here, in front of me. But why now?

I feel myself pulling away and standing. It's almost as if someone else had taken over me because I hear myself talking but not out of love or passion but mostly fear? "You're right...what was I thinking?"

Emily looks at me as if she can't believe I'm actually doing this. Smoothing her hands over her jeans, she stands and faces me. "Wait...wait a minute...I..I was only kidding, Stef..." her fingers run down the side of my neck but my jaw clenches as I reach down to pick up my hat and dust it off.

"We should get back..." clearing my throat, I kneel and begin to pack up the remaining food in the picnic basket.

"Stef...what you feel...what I feel? It's the same," she gently lays her hand on my arm making me stop for a moment to meet her eyes.

I lick my lips as I inhale slowly knowing I can't say much. No, I won't say much. Standing back up, I carry the basket to my truck, Emily in tow. I should never have started this to begin with. What was I thinking? It would never work! We'd be hiding all of the time, and what kind of mother hides when she has a 12 year old daughter to raise and needs to be an example by showing her how to be a decent human being? Hiding is the opposite of that!

"Stef, please! Don't do this! It's not just you!"

"Stop, Emily...just get in the truck," I motion with my hand as I open the passenger door.

"So, this was all just some game to you? Chase the girl and see how close you can get? Thinking, 'Oh, she'll never feel the same! So I'm safe!' Only to find out she does? So, it's not fun anymore? Is that how it is, Stefanie Foster?" Her face was now tinged pink as her voice continually rose, but nothing she was saying could ever, ever dissuade me. Nothing, for I had gotten used to living this life. This life where I had to stay hidden. Keep quiet. Not make waves.

"Of course not! You think I WANT to pack up and head back? You think I WANT to hide? Do you?" Slamming my hand on the side of the truck nearest her, I watch her jump a little.

"Stefanie Marie Foster! I won't be made a fool of!" Her chin begins quivering, and my soft heart starts to melt some. Before I can catch my body up with my brain, I'm pushing my body against hers into the truck, and we're kissing like we've been wanting to now for weeks.

STEF*

I struggle to breathe now as I walk aways from Lena and Callie if only to get my bearings and thoughts back in order. Everything Callie just said to me, I knew to be oh, so true. Everything. And the way my family system worked was through sequestered feelings. We never really got things out in the open. We buried them, deep, deep inside of us. And we left them there. I was very much like my father, and he like his. And as I glance back at my now teenage daughter, I see she is carrying on the family trait: only a bit differently. She went and dug for her truth. I waited until my dad was gone to dig up my own truth.

Tears blur my vision now as I taste the saltiness on my tongue, and I realize I'm crying. Crying is not something I do. Breaking down is never an option, but soon, I feel my chest burning and hear my small gasps for air making my mind register that I'm literally falling apart and in public. Swiftly turning around, I find my hand muffling the choked out sobs threaten to make me ill. Sobs of buried feelings. Sobs of buried truths. Sobs of so much guilt and pain. Sobs of deep grief for my father, for I never allowed myself to grieve him. I didn't have the time.

And right as my knees about hit the hardened earth beneath me, strong arms grab me from behind, pulling me against the warm body of the woman I love with all of my heart, Lena Adams.

LENA*

Holding my girlfriend in my arms, I knew she needed this breaking point. I was so thankful when Russ came back and asked if he could take Callie for some lunch. I didn't see a problem with it considering he promised to just go to one of the food vendors who had already set up and were starting to cook for the growing crowd of campers.

"Lets go for a walk, ok?" Stef was a blubbering mess, and I knew she was most likely embarrassed to be seen like this. Looking around quickly, I scan the area and see a tent off to the side. Peeking inside, I pull her in with me.

"Lena...I...I...can't! Please!" I pull her to me as she sobs into my neck. "I hid for...I kissed her! He said I...he said he'd never leave me the ranch! She was my baby! He couldn't take her!"

As she rambles on and on, my heart pounds as I begin to realize everything she's been burying. There is more to this story. I cup her cheeks as I look deeply into her eyes, "Shhhhhh, my love, I know. I know you're hurting...it's okay to cry with me. You're safe."

She nods as she sniffles then laughs some, "I need to blow my nose. I have snot all over your shirt..."

I giggle some as I see her sense of humor was still in tact and I pull out a wadded up tissue from my pocket and dry her tear stained face as she grabs it.

"There is so much I need to tell you, Lena. So, so much...I don't even know where to begin." Her voice sounds tired, as if she's been defeated.

My heart shatters as she says this because I know this is the beginning of her healing. I brush her cheek over and over again. "I know. I know, my baby...but first, I think we need to reunite and sit down and talk, ok? Talking is healthy. You're going to be fine, and so will your baby girl. You'll both be fine..."

"What would I do without you?" She kicks a mound of grass with the tip of her boot and smiles awkwardly at me.

I lean in to brush her lips with mine, "What would I do without you? My beautiful, beautiful love." I kiss her over and over as my hand runs down her arm, and I feel her relax. As I pull back, I smile as I continue, "Callie just called me Mama..."


	27. Chapter 27

STEF*

"Not long after that, I cut things off with her, and it's only because I knew that I would not have a place on the ranch if I pursued it. Maybe I was wrong, or maybe I was right. Either way, I was a coward for not coming clean to my dad, yet if I had and pursued her, would I have even met you?" This conversation is one of the hardest I've ever had with Lena, yet my heart knows that she would never ever judge me. She loves me unconditionally, and she listens intently showing me she really cares.

I wipe the tears that fall down my cheeks as she squeezes my hand. "I don't know, Stef, but I do know that moving forward is the only way in life. Closing doors and looking into the future is the only way you can keep going on a good path. If you keep looking back, you'll eventually crash or you'll even prolong your happiness."

My eyes look into hers as the sun sets in the western sky: red, orange, purple and blue, painted with a wide stroke across the mountainous horizon. This is the very spot where I first kissed her, and she ran. It was in this spot my heart told me I loved her. "I love you...so much, Lena Adams..."

She smiles widely as she leans in and this time, it's her lips that brush mine softly, making me shiver from head to toe. We both are beyond exhausted, yet being here, home on the ranch, sitting on my big wrap around porch and watching the sunset together makes me feel at peace.

She sighs softly as she lays her head on my shoulder, "I'm so thankful all of that is behind us. Callie is in for a long punishment, but at least she is now safe and under your roof again."

"Our roof, babe..." I kiss the top of her curly head softly as my eyes close. I love my little family, and soon, I want to propose to this woman. We both are silent as twilight nears, and I remember all that transpired before we got back here just last night.

FLASHBACK*

"So, you mean to tell me you thought it was okay that you were this deceitful? Because you needed answers? No way, Callie! I raised you better than that!" My face is on fire as is my temper, and it doesn't matter that Lena is squeezing my thigh under the table trying her hardest to keep me calm. I'm angry, and I will not back down from my rebellious daughter.

"I think I made bad decisions, but I refuse to regret it!" The teen sits across from Stef, folding her arms, her face stubborn.

"Callie, I'm sure you could have sat your mom down and asked her to get in touch with me. It wasn't fair you pretended to be her to get to me," Russ is sitting next to the girl and is trying to help out. This is all new to him, but he doesn't forget being a stubborn teenage boy, especially when it came to wanting to get with Stef.

"Why are you all ganging up on me? I said I'm sorry! What else do you want? I refuse to regret it. And Mom, you didn't make it easy to talk about dad! You shut down every time!"

"Young lady, I sat and talked to you about those letters! You could so talk to me," Stef isn't backing down either, and the tension feels like it can now be cut with a knife. The teen's leg is bouncing up and down, arms folded, Stef's face is red, Lena looks worried and upset, and Russ is darting his eyes between all three.

"Ok, you guys, there's no right or wrong to what you're all saying. BUT, Callie, it was wrong to use deceit as your tool. You deceived Jarrod, Russ, your mom and even myself," Lena now chimes in calmly.

Several moments of silence happen before Stef stands and places both hands on the table, "I don't care if you think you're wrong or not, you are grounded indefinitely, Callie Quinn Foster. No ifs, ands or buts. So, get in the truck. We're going home..." She turns and heads that way, leaving the rest in stunned silence.

Russ looks at Lena then Callie before everyone stands. "Callie..." he tries to get her attention, and the girl turns to looks at him. "We'll figure something out, kid. I'm not walking away this time."

"Ya, whatever," she picks at one of the holes in her blue jeans as she scuffs her boot in the grass.

"I'm serious, Callie. I want to try and make up for all the time lost." Russ places her hand on her arm making her look at him. "You are so much like her, kid. Just try to see her side of things...she is right more times than you know, and she may come across really harsh, but you know deep down inside, she's scared you could've gotten hurt..."

Callie sighs making him trail off, and she just stares into his green eyes. She can't figure him out at all. Why did he want her mom so badly if he knew she was gay? "Can I ask you something, Russell?"

The girl's dad nods as he drops his hand. "Anything, Callie."

"Do you still...I mean, why her?"

"Why Stef? You mean why did I want her?" He plays with his hat in his hands. "Honestly, I didn't know back then. She always was the toughest, sexiest, most athletic girl in the school. And she was always so kind..." he laughs a little as it remembering something from the past, but shakes his head. "Anyways, that's in the past. Go on, ok? I'll call soon."

Callie nods and hurries to get in the back seat of the truck, but as they begin to pull off, she looks out the window, looking towards where Russ stood a few moments before. Maybe she would try to form a relationship with him. After all, he was her father, and he's the reason she started all of this in the first place.

FLASHBACK ENDS*

The screen door shuts quietly alerting both women, making them turn to see Callie walking towards them sheepishly. She had come home last night and refused to come downstairs for the entire day, even to eat. Lena had put food on her desk, hoping she'd get up from her bed and at least try to eat, and she had refused that as well. Stef had told Lena tough love is what brought her through her own teen years, and tough love will break through to her daughter.

"Mom? Mama?" she pads her way to stand in front of the pair. Her messy bun makes her look so young as she stands there in bare feet, a small tank top and pj shorts.

Looking at her baby, Stef can't help the melting that is going on inside her own heart, and although she knows she has to stand firm, she can feel the love for Callie erupting all over the place. "Come and sit, my baby," she pats between her and Lena as she scoots over.


	28. Chapter 28

LENA*

My heart breaks as I watch the interaction between mom and daughter, and over the last weeks, my own heart has opened up to the girl making her feel like mine as well. I never even knew I could be a mother, for Gretchen never ever wanted to talk about children. If I were to bring it up, she'd quickly divert the subject to other things like the growing stock market or a new author she met on one of her travels. But since meeting Stef and Callie, everything has changed drastically inside of me including that desire to be a mother.

"You know how much we love you, yes?" Callie nods as Stef wraps her arm around her shoulders. Lena can tell Callie is still somewhat nervous because she keeps playing with her fingers. "Look at me, my baby," Stef softly tilts her chin with her fingers.

Tears form in the young girl's eyes as Stef looks into them, and she leans in and kisses the tip of her nose softly, "Shhhhh, don't cry...you scared the hell out of us." Her voice cracks then, and that's when Callie wraps her arms tightly around my girlfriend.

"I'm so sorry, Mom! I thought about it all day, and if I was my daughter, I'd be so mad! I'm so sorry! I'm so stubborn, and I always insist I do my own thing! I don't understand why I do! But I do! Please forgive me! Please, Mom!" She buries her face in Stef's neck and sobs her heart out.

I watch Stef's heart break as she holds on to her daughter then moves to cup her wet cheeks in hr hands. "Look at me, love! Shhhhh, try to breathe!"

Callie struggles to regain her composure as she begins rambling yet again. "I messed up...I...so...Mama..." she blubbers now as I move to hold on to the girl with my girlfriend. We both lean in and kiss her cheeks and hair trying to console her as I run my hand up and down her back.

"Shhhhh, Callie. Let it all out. You have so much to cry for, and so much to let go..." I whisper in her ear as she leans towards me some now.

I rest my cheek on the top of head as her crying quiets some, and I can feel Stef softly running the back of her hand down my other cheek. "Mama?" I finally hear her say my name, one which I'll never get tired of hearing.

I sit up now as Callie also sits up and wipes her cheeks and sniffles. "Can you ever forgive me? For...for all I've said and...and done?" She looks at me, so much worry on her young face that I want to cry.

"Oh, honey, always...I do. It's in the past, now, ok?" I lean in as she now wraps her arms around my neck and we cry together. Next to the day Stef told me she loved me, this is the happiest day of my life.

STEF*

The growth that occurred over the past couple of days between me and Callie, Callie and Lena and Lena and me was enough to make my heart burst. I couldn't believe that this was my life, and just how quickly our lives had changed within the past year. I have many regrets when it comes to my dad, yet as Lena said, we can only move forward.

And with each passing day, I knew that I wanted to seal the deal with Lena and officially make her my wife. I knew from the moment I laid eyes on her broken down on the side of the road, that she was somebody special, and as time went on, I knew I wanted to spend each and every day with her. I wanted to wake up in her arms, hold her hand, sit across from her at dinner, and hold her each night as we drifted off to sleep. I trusted this woman with my very life and with the life of my baby girl. I knew that she felt the same way, for as each time we made love, I saw deeper into her soul.

"Callie, baby, I want to talk to you. Mind if we go out for a trail ride, just you and me?" I stood in her doorway as she had been grounded now going on a month. After our talk that night on the porch, she had served her time meekly and quietly even going as far as doing extra chores for me and Lena to show us how remorseful she really was. I was so proud of her strides, and as the school year was coming to a close, I wanted to talk to her about several things.

"What about dinner? Mama shouldn't eat alone..." Callie for off her bed and went to gather her riding boots.

"No, I spoke to Mama, and she is going to be writing late today. We'll have a light late supper."

Callie was just excited to get out of her room and into the barn, and as the pair saddled their horses, she talked Stef's ear off about her school day. As mother and daughter headed out onto their favorite trail, Stef got right to the point.

"So, as you know, I love Lena very very much, and I wanted to wait until you felt the same," I pause as I look over at my baby girl. "You do feel the same, yes?"

"Yes, very much so. You have no idea how badly I feel for my poor treatment of her when she first showed up. You taught me better than that, Mom," Callie replies sadly as we move farther down the lane.

"I just wanted to ask you if it's okay that I ask Mama to marry me. I have never wanted to do anything to harm you, love, and I never would do this if you didn't want it. You will always come first to me, baby...and that's why I brought you out on this ride...to ask if it's ok..." my heart hammers as I think I know her answer, but I don't know one hundred percent.

"I know you love her, Mom. I have never seen you this at peace and happy! Ever since Lena came into your life, you have become a little softer," the young girl says to me.

I can't help but blush slightly as we both stop our horses. Reaching between us, I hold out my hand to my daughter. "So, that's a yes?"

She squeezes my hand tightly and with tears in her eyes, she whispers back, "It's a yes, Mom."

Just 2 more chapters to this story! So excited you all have been following their journey!*


	29. Chapter 29

LENA*

"I have not always been upfront with you. As a matter of fact, the first time you kissed me, I ran away...out of town, and thought it was okay to flee the state." Everyone in the audience laughs at this as do I and Stef. She squeezes my hands as I continue. "But today, I'm more upfront than I have ever been with anyone, and I'm standing here in front of friends and family, making a promise to you, Stefanie Marie Foster, that I will always come to you with all of my fears, hopes and dreams. That I will stand by your side through good times and dark ones. That I will love you and tell you that everyday of your life. You are my best friend. You are my person, and today, I'm so happy," my voice falters some. "I'm so incredibly happy to call you mine."

Stef wipes her eyes before grabbing my hands again. The way she looks at me makes everyone and everything fade away, and it's as if it's just me and her right here, right now in this moment. "I'm not as good with words as you are. You are the writer!" I smile as she says this, and a few laugh. My thumbs run over her soft hands as I can tell she's really nervous.

"Uhhhh," she licks her lips, pausing as she keeps wiping her eyes, and soon Callie hands her a tissue. She winks and kisses her forehead as she wipes her eyes. "I said I wasn't going to cry, and here I am like a blubbering fool!"

She jokes with me, and I mouth to her, "It's ok, love.."

"I'm so grateful for the woman I have become, and I have fully, fully become her partly because of you, and partly because I decided enough was enough. I needed to be me, be proud, and embrace all of me so I could stand here today and make you mine. I promise to cherish you," her voice cracks again as she squeezes the life out of my hands. "I promise to take care of you, and to tell you everyday of our lives just how much I love you and am proud to be your wife."

My heart explodes as she finishes her vows, and soon we are exchanging rings and kissing as wife and wife. When we are introduced as Mrs. and Mrs. Adams Foster, I find myself nuzzling into her neck as she wraps her arms around me. I have never felt more safe and more secure than when I am in her arms. All of this is like a dream come true for me, and as the music plays and we walk hand in hand down the aisle, I feel as if I am floating on cloud nine.

"Kinda cliche, don't you think?" She whispers to me as people line up to congratulate us.

"What is?" I whisper back as we begin hugging and greeting friends and family.

"We said not a traditional wedding, yet here we are!" She winks at me as her Aunt Marlene hugs her and begins talking her ear off.

I'm unable to respond to her right away as we are caught up in the hustle and bustle of greeting everyone and giving hugs and receiving words of congratulations. Finally, we are able to find our way to a private corner, and as we hold hands, Stef pulls me towards her.

"This has to be one of the happiest days of my life, Mrs. Adams Foster," she breathes me in as we begin slow dancing to the music in the background.

I place my hands on her hips as I look into her intense hazel eyes, "Are you disappointed in how it turned out?"

She runs her hands up my back as her forehead rests on mine, "Not at all, baby love..."

Our hips continue to sway in time with the music as we are in a trance of our own. It seems surreal that I am here, in her arms as her wife. We have already been through so much within the last year, and I never dreamed that losing everything in my life would bring me right where I am supposed to be. And the way, she proposed? To say I was shocked is an understatement, yet I was.

FLASHBACK*

STEF*

"Hurry up, Cals! She'll be home any minute now!"

"I'm trying, Mom! I can't help it that I was held up in my music practice!"

My heart races as do my hands. I am definitely nervous about this. In a way, I want it to be special and unique, yet in another way, I'm more nervous that it's too corny and cliche. One thing I have learned about Lena is that even though she's been spoiled by the finer things in life, the simplest things make her smile.

"Ok, hand me that bucket, please then go ahead and get changed," I instruct Callie, and she hands me the bucket filled with ice and champagne. I look around at the loft that we've managed to turn into an intimate setting, and I feel pleased.

When walking up the ladder, one instantly would see bails of hay stacked neatly along with strings of white inflammable lights. A rough table with a cream linen tablecloths is in the center with two rough chairs which Stef had adorned with comfy cushions. The rest was kind of a cliche as low candles adorn the center of the table and fancy dinner ware where each of them would sit is placed. Rose petals are scattered along the floor, and off to the side, Stef had made a bed with lots of blankets and pillows.

I nervously look around as I head back down the ladder to head to change. I have decided to wear black dress pants and a simple white blouse. Running mousse through my short hair, I look in the mirror and decide on light makeup. After spritzing some light cologne over my neck and wrists, I head back downstairs and to the barn. Both Callie and a couple of her friends have agreed to be the waitresses and photographer tonight which I find to be just perfect because I really wanted Callie to be involved in some way.

As I head up to the loft, I turn on the soft music and wait for Lena to arrive. I look out the loft window, and my stomach flutters as I see the tail lights to her car as she has just pulled up. I see Callie meet her, and they talk for a few minutes before hugging. Brianne takes her bag while Callie takes her hand, leading her to the barn, and this is where I feel light headed as if I might faint. I wait at the top of the stairs for Lena, and when I see her curly head, I hold out my hand, "It's about time, Miss Adams!"

"What's this?" her cheeks are flushed as she takes my hand, and I pull her to me.

"THIS is our night, and it's ALL for you, my love," I kiss her lips softly and she looks around the loft.

"Oh my god! You did this ALL for me?" she smiles widely at me as I lead her to sit down across from me.

"Well, I had some help."

Callie, Brianne, and Chelsea all come up the steps, and the evening progresses. We have our appetizer, entree and then dessert. Everything goes as planned, and as I notice Lena wiping her mouth with her cloth napkin after she takes her last bite of cheesecake, I notice my queue and reach in my bag for a book.

"So, I got something in the mail this week. Something you've been waiting for for a few months now..." I hand her the book, and her eyes widen in surprise.

"Oh my god! The first draft of my book! Stef!" She excitedly looks at the cover, and it's like she's a kid at Christmas.

My heart thuds so hard in my chest, I am certain I won't make it through. "It was so hard hiding this from you. You even almost found it the other day," I laugh nervously.

She opens it up, "Oh my god, I just can't right now! I can't wait to read this and see what needs tweaked and get the ball rolling. This seems too good to be true!" I reach across the table and take her hand as I smile softly.

"I wanted tonight to be special. You know it's our one year anniversary, and I didn't forget like you thought I did," I wink at her and she rewards me with one of her melting smiles.

"Well, I am very much surprised." She whispers as she squeezes my hand.

"Look inside the book," I finally suggest, and she lets go of my hand and thumbs through the pages. Reaching the book-mark, she pulls it out, and as she looks up at me, I'm on one knee in front of her.

"Lena Adams, you have managed to walk into my life, and I can't imagine this life without you. Will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?" I nervously stammer as I hold out a small, black velvet box with a ring.

She screams shrilly as if she is both excited and caught off guard, and all she manages to do is hold out her hand for me to place the ring on her finger. I slide it on with ease as I look up into her eyes, "You didn't answer me, baby..." I whisper.

"YES! YES! YES YES YES!" she squeals as she jumps in my arms, wrapping her arms around my neck.

FLASHBACK ENDS*

As we continue to sway to the music, I finally cup the side of her face and whisper, "Look at me, my love." Her eyes meet mine, and I lean in very close as I whisper softly, "I wouldn't trade this day for any other day of my life. I am so thankful I broke down on the side of the road that day, baby. If only to meet the love of my life." I kiss her softly as we are in a world of our own. We kiss each other over and over as our bodies connect. Today, we are in front of everyone, and I know this is a huge step for Stef, and I am the happiest woman in the world.


	30. Chapter 30

STEF*

"I couldn't ask for a better honeymoon to be honest," Lena nuzzles my neck as we walk along the bank of the river. We had decided to stay close to home, and I had rented a cabin about an hour away for a whole week. Tonight, we had gone exploring as it was the first time we had left the cabin since we arrived three days ago.

"I know it's nothing fancy, but you know me. I like seclusion, and I know you still have country in you," I squeeze her hand as she kisses on my chin. "You keep doing that, we are gonna have to head back inside, woman!" I playfully slap her ass, and she giggles.

"Well, that's quite alright with me!" she teases as I pull on her arm softly, stopping us as we reach a field.

"Do you hear that?" I whisper as she stops to look at me.

"Hear what, silly?"

"I swear I heard a horse whinny!" I laugh softly as I pull on her arm again, and we head towards the field.

"You have horses on your mind, Stef! It's in your blood!" she humors me but follows close behind. We hike a ways through the field and up a little knoll. As we reach the top, she gasps. "You were right! Look over there!"

My heart races as I follow where she's pointing and low and behold, we see a group of wild horses along the tree line. "Good god almighty! It's been a while since I've actually seen them!" I excitedly point out as we quickly sit together on the grassy knoll to watch.

"Do you know what kind they are? Are they dangerous?"

I laugh at how enthusiastic she is and pull her into my arms, wrapping my arms around her as she practically sits in my lap. I whisper near her ear, "The one on the far right is an appaloosa or a painted horse. They are worth a lot of money, and yes, to answer your second question, they are dangerous. They are wild, and if I were to try and capture one of them, it'd be a very tricky situation. Often times, the stallions won't allow a human female to break them, and they've been known to actually charge a woman like a crazed bull."

She listens intently as I tell her this while she runs her hands up and down my thighs, "Hmmm, are you speaking from experience, Mrs. Adams Foster?" she giggles softly as we watch the appaloosa run over to a black mare. I'm quiet for a moment as we both watch the two horses nuzzle each other.

"I think they're a couple. Watch how they interact!" I whisper excitedly as I run my hands up and down her bare arms.

"I think you may be right. Do horses mate for life?"

"Hmmmm, well, I do know that once a horse makes a friend, they are friends for life; so, it's quite possible. I haven't really studied the wild horses behavior when it came to mating. And as for speaking from experience? Yes, when I was 16, I insisted on breaking a wild stallion and was almost killed in the process. Thank God Russ was with me because he was able to warn me to get out of the pen. I was furious with him for letting the stallion go. I thought he did it to spite me and prove me wrong." I laugh as I recount the story.

Lena turns in my arms and begins kissing on my neck. "Well, it doesn't surprise me that you were one stubborn kid. Thank god for Russ, right?" she whispers as she begins kissing on me making me lose my train of thought. I run my hands up her soft thighs as she pulls me under her spell.

"Mhmmm," I murmur as her fingers run through my short hair.

"Stefanie..Marie..Adams..Foster... you are my...wild horse..." she croons softly as she nips at my earlobe causing goosebumps to rush over my body.

"What... are you doing to me?" I finally manage.

She quickly gets up and holds out her hand. "Come, lets head back to the cabin."

I willingly take her hand, never breaking eye contact as she helps me to my feet, and pulls me to her. As the sun sets around us, I pull her to me, kissing her deeply. I could never ask for a more perfect wife. My heart races like it has done every time we are deep in the moment, and as our tongues roll over each others, I feel a deeper connection, if that's even possible.

"Cabin...now..." she manages to pull away, and we head back that way as darkness chases us to the front door.

Barely making it inside, she pushes my shirt over my sturdy shoulders whimpering words of love to me. "Let me...this time..." she moans softly, unhooking my bra.

I let go as she steps back and slides off her sundress. I bite my bottom lip as I realize she didn't have neither a bra or panties on underneath. "Bad girl..." I moan as she pushes me back on to the bed. She kneels down as she pushes my legs apart, looking up into my eyes.

"And you like it that way..." she replies in a sexy tone.

My hands plant themselves behind me to hold myself up as I tilt my head, allowing her to have her way with me. Her tongue takes me to places I didn't know existed as she devours me deeply.

"Baby...oh god...Lena!!!! FUCK!!!!!" I moan louder and louder, and right when I think I can't handle anymore, she plunges two fingers deeply into me making me instantly unravel as I tug on her curls.

I ride the waves as she does this to me two more times, and each time, I topple over the edge harder and harder until I collapse. When she's done, she moves up my body, kissing every single part of me until she reaches my lips. "I think I just got done breaking you, Stefanie Marie Adams Foster," she croons softly in my ear as we move up onto the bed and snuggle into each other.

I laugh softly as she uses witty "horse" language with me in bed. "You are something else, Lena Elizabeth Adams Foster," I say in a low voice as I brush her curls back. "And I wouldn't have you any other way."

As we pull the blanket over our naked bodies, I close my eyes and relax in her arms. Thinking back over the past year, I never would have dreamed that this is where my life would have taken me. I was not all the way open and myself just last year, and I didn't have any future plans of doing so. I hadn't met anyone, and since my father died, I had plunged deep into my work. I smile as I drift off to sleep. I smile as I think of one last funny thing to say to Lena before we sleep. "Wild horses wouldn't keep us apart, my love. If I had to do it all over again, I wouldn't change a thing." She moves so she can look into my eyes and brushes her thumb over my cheek. "You have a tremendous sense of humor, love," She giggles softly and I playfully slap her.

"So, I've heard." I kiss her temple then as she snuggles into my arms.

Thank you for reading as I wrote this! This was my very first Stef/Lena fanfic, and I enjoyed every bit of it!️*


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